For this post, I'm going to do a little experiment to see how much like a real Magic card I can make my card look, within the limits of the forum's formatting capabilities, without using a render.
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Bribe —
Sorcery (C)
Target player creates two Treasure tokens. Bribe deals 3 damage to that player.
If money really made the world go 'round, Fiora's citizens would have flown off the ground by now.

This card was an afterthought to the personal essay I posted it at the end of. It was a little overwrought, so I thought I'd take another shot at designing a card with that name:

Perfection —
Creature — Fractal Incarnation (U)
Protection from creatures whose power and toughness aren't equal
“It is the witness still of excellency to put a strange face on his own perfection.”
—William Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing
2/2

Lyvella, Rider of Lotus-scale —
Legendary Creature — Elf Shaman (M)
Vigilance, trample, haste
: Add .
Her song can make the heavens dance, and as her mount advances, the sun and moon renew their love.
8/5

Dragon Roost
Tribal Land — Dragon (R)
: Add .
, : Add . Spend this mana only to cast Dragon spells or activate abilities of Dragons.
After a hellkite marks his territory, few remain to contest his rule.

Ludevic's Magnum Opus —
Sorcery
As an additional cost to cast Ludevic's Magnum Opus, sacrifice a Plant or Saproling, a Skeleton or Zombie, and a Kraken, Leviathan, Octopus, or Serpent.
Create a 13/13 black, green, and blue Plant Zombie Octopus Horror creature token with menace, trample, and ward .

Thinking about how Silly said the only reason Mishra's Bauble sees play in Modern is to get another card type in your graveyard for Dragon's Rage Channeler:

Tawnos's Bauble —
Tribal Artifact — Artificer (U)
Sacrifice Tawnos's Bauble: The next time you draw one or more cards, draw an additional card.
“Funny little thing, isn't it?”
—Urza, to Mishra

A streamlined version of a card i submitted to raz's contest:

The Book of Calculomancy —
Sorcery (U)
Create a 1/1 blue Fractal creature token with flying, a 2/3 blue Fractal creature token with flying, and a 5/8 blue Fractal creature token with flying.

Dissolve —
Sorcery (C)
Return target nongreen creature to its owner's hand. Its controller discards a card.
“A basilisk’s gaze is effective, but disposing of physical remains is a tiresome task. It’s far more discreet to dissolve one’s victim entirely.”
—Szadek

Wish upon a Star —
Instant (C)
Draw a card.
Miracle—Each opponent gains 2 life.
"Do I really have to keep doing this?" Leilarc asked no one in particular. Suddenly, the sky itself shot out an answer.

Sheoldred's Whisper —
Instant (C)
Put a -1/-1 counter on target creature. If you control that creature, draw a card.
Sheoldred's whispers are seductive. Those driven to madness by their incessance, once cured, express an insatiable longing to hear them once more.

Twig Snapped Underfoot —
Artifact (C)
, Sacrifice Twig Snapped Underfoot: Search your library for a card named Llanowar Elves, reveal it, and put it into your hand.

Circle of Life —
Sorcery (U)
Create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token.
Sacrifice a creature.
Create a 3/3 green Beast creature token.

I think Circle of Life would be cooler if it were an instant with some generic added to the cost. So you could sac a removal target or at least 'exchange' a tapped creature for an untapped 1/1 as a chumper in combat or whatnot.