Erik Sylvaine looked around the little town. It was a nice, comfortable little town, and you could easily live there your whole life without lacking anything. Most people would spend their entire life in a town like this, and never travel further than a few miles. But Erik Sylvaine was not like most people. Looking back just once, Erik shrugged, shook his head, and left the world behind him.
Unlike everyone else in that small town, Erik was a planeswalker. He had the ability to travel between worlds, and although he didn't use that ability often, it was very useful for solving complicated problems. And the problem Erik was facing right now was the most complicated one he'd ever seen. He finished his trip, and found himself standing on a crowded street. Looking around, he suddenly felt dizzy. At the end of the street, the city ended. And it wasn't just that he was at city limits, it was that there was nothing outside of the city limits other than a terrifying drop. Carefully, Erik walked up to the edge and looked down. Far below him, he could see the ground, and finally he remembered the tales he had heard of this city. He had never been here before, but another planeswalker had told him of a city sitting on top of an overturned mountain. But while that was a very interesting sight, it was not the reason why he had come here. Instead, he was seeking the another thing that friend had told him about. A master healer, who was said to be able to protect anyone from anything, as long as they could pay for it. And Erik wanted to protect someone back home. He stopped to think for a moment. It was strange for him to be walking the planes again. Most people never stopped traveling once they became planeswalker. But Erik Sylvaine was not like most people. He had found his home in that little town, and he wanted to go back there as soon as possible. He decided to get going. All he knew knew about this healer he was looking for was that people called him “The Wishmonger”, and he hoped that would be enough.
It was. The first person he asked provided him with instructions, and for the first time on the trip, Erik thought this might turn out to be easy. He found the right building, which seemed like a sort of chapel, and he carefully knocked on the door. When a voice told him to enter, he pushed his way inside. Once through the door, he stopped. He wasn't sure what he had expected, but it wasn't this. Although the person in front of him stood upright as a man, he was unlike any man Erik had ever met. His head was that of a horse, with a single horn in the center of the forehead. The human-like body was covered in heavy white robes, and Erik couldn't help but feel small standing in front of the tall unicorn. In a situation like that, most people would have a hard time finding the right words to say. But Erik Sylvaine wasn't most people. He straightened his back, and spoke.
“Are you the one they call the Wishmonger?” Erik liked getting straight to the point. The big creature looked at him curiously, and answered. “That is one of the titles I have been given.” “Then it is true that you can heal people?” Erik hoped he wasn't being rude, he just really wanted to get some answers quickly. “I have certain abilities in that direction.” The unicorn's face twisted in what Erik hoped was a smile, and continued. “Is it you who need it, or someone else?” Erik shook his head. “Someone else, back home. She's badly ill, and none of our local healers can help.” The unicorn looked him straight in the eyes. “I assume she is too weak to come here.” When Erik nodded, the Wishmonger spoke again. “Can you take me to her?” Erik's eyes widened. This was something he hadn't thought about. “Actually, I can't. I was hoping you could just give me a cure.” The unicorn shook his head. “I would need to have something that she has used after the illness gripped her, just to know what it is. And even then, there is no guarantee that I could make a working cure.” Erik quickly reached into his bag and pulled out a thin silver chain. “This is her necklace. She was wearing it up until yesterday, when she took it off because her throat was swelling. I only brought it to remind me why I'm here. Would that help?” The Wishmonger took the chain in one of his four-fingered hands. “It might give me the answers I need. Even so, we have one more thing to discuss. Payment.” Erik felt a sudden urge to fall on his knees, begging. Resisting, he looked right in the unicorn's eyes. “If you can give me what I ask for, I will pay you anything.” Again, the tall figure shook his head. “It is not what you ask for, but how you ask for it. And a case like this would require that you ask in a very special manner.” Noticing that Erik was just staring at him, he continued. “I am not the only one of my kind. We are a small tribe which lives far from here. But we have always had one of us here in the city to fill this position. Many years ago, one of my predecessors died. A friend was tasked with bringing him back to the tribe with his equipment, so that he could have a proper burial, and so that the tribe could choose a replacement. However, on the way, that man was attacked by a two-headed dragon. He managed to get away, but the dragon took some of our ancient artifacts and added them to his hoard. One of those is an old staff, and if you can bring it back to me, no further payment shall be necessary.” Most people would refuse such a dangerous task, but Erik Sylvaine was not like most people. “How do I find the dragon, and how do I know what to take?” Now, Erik thought that the unicorn was smiling, but he still wasn't sure. “I know where the dragon's lair is, and I have a drawing of the staff I could give you. I can also protect you from from the dragon's flames. The claws and teeth, you have to worry about yourself.”
Minutes later, Erik was making his way down the mountain. The Wishmonger had given him a map and a drawing, just as he had promised, and he had also placed some sort of spell on him. According to the Wishmonger, it made him immune to dragonfire. But only for 24 hours, and the dragon's lair was several miles away, so he knew he had to hurry. Most people would be afraid of running straight into a dragon's lair, but then again, Erik Sylvain really was not like most people.
Chapter 2
As Erik headed down the inverted mountain, he slid a hand across the the rock, feeling the power inside it. Although he wasn't a powerful wizard, Erik did know a few magic tricks, and he would need lots of power behind them to defeat the dragon. So he pulled as much as he could out of the mountain, and as he came out and passed through some small woods, he did the same there. Erik knew he had to hurry to get there before the Wishmonger's protection wore off, so he decided to just keep walking through the night. Most people would not have been ready to do that without preparation, but Erik Sylvaine was not like most people. Before he had settled down, he had had some grand adventures, and heading into a dragon's lair made him feel younger than he had in years.
As he reached the cave which was marked on the map, Erik stopped for a few moments to think about how to deal with the dragon. He had never met a two-headed dragon before, and he was almost looking forward to the challenge of getting past it. He looked around, trying to find anything he could use to his advantage. After a few moments consideration, he made a decision. Most people would have tried to sneak in without being noticed, but Erik Sylvaine was not like most people. He walked right in and announced himself. He got a warm reception. Very warm. Fortunately, the Wishmonger's protective spell worked, and the flames the dragon spewed at him didn't even singe his clothes. Seeing him standing there unharmed, the dragon's two heads shot each other a glance of confusion, and then it stretched it's wings and charged towards Erik. He turned and ran out to the mouth of the cave. There were plenty of vines growing across the cliff-face, and as the dragon came out, Erik made a single gesture, and several of the vines snapped off of the rocks and twisted themselves around the dragon's wings. With a roar of surprise, the dragon hit the ground. Erik kept running away a bit for good measure, which turned out to be a good idea, as the dragon quickly found its footing and started following him on the ground. Erik felt a bit more on even ground now that firebreathing and flying were not being used against him, but the dragon still seemed to have an advantage.
Soon the dragon was close enough to that Erik knew it was just a matter of time before it would be able to bite his head off. And that was not something he looked forward to. He picked up his pace, running straight towards the edge of the woods. He spotted the large oak tree he had picked out before entering the cave, and headed towards it. Most people would avoid running head first into an oak tree, but as I am certain you know by now, Erik Sylvain was not like most people. Instead, he just spoke a single word and kept running straight through the tree. And while the two-headed dragon shared his enthusiasm, it didn't share his ability for woodland magic. As a result, the dragon came to a sudden stop as the base of its necks struck the trunk of the tree. Erik was worried for just a moment that the tree would not be able to stand against the force of the dragon's pushing, but fortunately it stayed standing. Erik was satisfied that the dragon was too angry to think clearly. This gave him two advantages. First, it made it less likely that the dragon would think about the possibility of backing up in order to get around the tree. Second, it made it easier for him to use his other kind of magic. Using the power he took from the mountain, he reached out and grabbed hold of the anger radiating from each head, and just twisted it a little bit. Suddenly, the two dragon heads turned and locked eyes. There was still an enormous amount of rage in all four eyes, but it was as though it had forgotten that Erik was there. Instead, the two heads began roaring, snapping, and biting at each other, as though they had forgotten that they were the same creature. Once Erik was sure that the spell had worked, he circled around the dragon and went back into the cave to search for the staff.
Chapter 3
As Erik entered the inner cavern, he was stunned. There were more artifacts, jewels, and coins in this cave than he had ever seen before. Most people would be tempted to stuff their pockets, but Erik Sylvaine was not like most people. He started moving with purpose in his steps. He was not sure how long his spell would keep the dragon busy, so he hurried through, scanning every item as he went past. Finally, he spotted it. High atop a large pile of various shiny things, far out of reach. Apparently, the dragon was more interested in gathering trinkets than organizing them. Cursing his luck, Erik started looking for footholds. As he got closer to the staff, he realized that many of the things carelessly tossed in the pile seemed to be magical, and he began wondering what kind of powers might be released if he broke something. Making a clear decision not to dwell on that scenario, he swallowed once and kept going, carefully. Finally, he reached the staff. It was very simple, mainly made out of wood, but with a handle which looked like it was made out of a unicorn's horn. And considering who owned it, he figured it very well might be. Sighing, he began to descend the mountain of trinkets. While it had been complicated to get up without breaking anything, it turned out to be a lot harder to get down while carrying a staff. Trying hard to keep his footing, he slowly made his way down. As he stepped back onto the floor, he felt the stack of artifacts shift. Turning in horror, Erik tried to assess the damage. Fortunately, it seemed like everything was settling without any ill effects. Right then, he heard a rattling sound from above. He looked up, just in time to see a line of beads sliding off of a protruding sword, and fall onto his shoulders.
Suddenly, Erik felt very strange. He felt somehow heavy and light at the same time. He couldn't think clearly. He shook his head to clear it, and the movement made the beads slide off of him. Suddenly, the heaviness left him, but the lightness remained. He felt much better. In fact, he felt like everything was just fine. It seemed to him like there was something he was supposed to be doing, but he couldn't remember what. He figured it would come to him eventually, and started strolling around, looking at the treasures. After a few minutes, he came back and spotted the staff which he had dropped. He picked it up by the handle, and suddenly a single word flashed in his mind; “Wishmonger”. He found that strange. He did remember something about a Wishmonger, but he couldn't quite connect it. Maybe it had something to do with the staff? It looked sort of like a healer's staff. And the moment after the word “healer” passed through his thoughts, another followed; “Elli”. The next moment, everything came back. Erik looked down at the beads, horrified that something that small and pretty could carry such risk, and then he turned and headed out of the cave.
As he made his way back towards the inverted mountain, he spotted the dragon, which had fainted from pain and exhaustion, still with one neck on either side of the tree. He briefly considered doing something about it, but he figured he had already wasted too much time. He made his way back as quickly as he could, and a few hours later, he was back at the Wishmonger's house. The large unicorn came out from his inner room, just as Erik entered. “Ah, you made it!” Erik was certain now that the Wishmonger was smiling. “And how is the dragon?” Erik smiled back, trying not to show just how tired he was at this point. “I figure it will wake up tomorrow with a pair of splitting headaches.” Without another word, he handed the staff over to the Wishmonger, who was visibly excited. “You have no idea how much this means to me. This staff is made out of the horn of one of my ancestors. He was one of the first Wishmongers, and probably the most powerful to ever live. He had powers I could only wish for.” As Erik threw him a look, he caught himself. “No pun intended. You see, there is a reason I asked you to bring this staff to me. By myself, I do not think I could solve your problem. But with the power that is stored in this staff, we might have a chance.”
The Wishmonger invited Erik into the back room, where a pot full of a thick liquid stood on a stove. The unicorn walked up, and carefully immersed the handle of the staff into the liquid. He lifted it up, and the liquid solidified like wax around the horn. The Wishmonger carefully handed the staff back to Erik. “This mixture should help her, and the staff will hopefully make it potent enough to provide an immediate recovery. Merely burn the wax, and make sure she breathes in the smoke. That is where the spell's power is held. And I trust that you will bring that staff back here once you are done with it.” Erik looked up, with a hopeful smile breaking through the tiredness. “Of course. That is the least I could do. Thank you.” And with those words, Erik left the Wishmonger, the city, and the world, and found his way home.
As he walked up towards the house, a woman came out to meet him. They quickly embraced, and Erik spoke. “Is there any change?” The woman looked at him, with tears in her eyes. “No. She hasn't moved or spoken since you left. I cannot get her to eat. I don't know how long she'll last.” Erik nodded, and hurried past her into the house. Going into the smaller bedroom in the back, he grabbed a candle on his way to the small figure in the bed. After gently lifting her into a sitting position, Erik held the staff's handle under her nose, and moved the candle right under it. Slowly, a sweet smelling smoke filled the air. Erik found it a bit hard to breathe, but still he only sat looking at the girl in the bed. Suddenly, she coughed. Erik quickly pulled the candle and staff back, to make sure she wouldn't get burnt, but he still didn't take his eyes off her. Then, as the girl kept coughing, she lifted an arm to cover her face and rub her eyes. She blinked a few times, getting used to the light. And then she spoke a single word. “Daddy?” As his wife hurried into the room, Erik hugged his daughter tightly. Most people would cry tears of joy in a situation like that, and sometimes; not often, but sometimes; Erik Sylvaine was just like most people.
Now that this poll is officially over, it's time to congratulate Aaarrrgh for designing Hill, which has been decided by popular vote to be the Card of the Month for October 2013!
This one is interesting, because it is a very different feel than most of what we have in the archives, but I think that is one of its strengths. We want variety, and while this story was written to be simple fiction, it is no less well-written because of it. I think this deserves a place in the archives.
A note: seeing as how this is now being submitted for the M:EM Archives, I have moved the original thread out of F&S and into the M:EM. There is a shadow thread in F&S that should redirect to the new location, but I thought it proper.
Yea, this was a fun read. One thing I noticed while I read is that the scene with the necklace was a bit jarring. I suppose I did not really understand either what happened, nor what the point of it was. It pulled me out of the narrative as I puzzled over it for a few minutes before moving on. Granted, I have been known to be rather thick, and I suppose I was not expecting it.
Anyway, this gets a "yea" from me. Solid work and simple, with repetitive phrasing and a good moral. You definitely found what you were looking for, in that this does seem like it sits at a fourth-ish grade reading level.
This is really interesting, what with the goal of 4th-grade reading level. It has a very strong feel of fairytale to it, which I like, and uses M:tG Assets well.
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"Enjoy your screams, Sarpadia - they will soon be muffled beneath snow and ice."
I'm a (self) published author now! You can find my books on Amazon in Paperback or ebook! The Accursed, a standalone young adult fantasy adventure. Witch Hunters, book one of a young adult Scifi-fantasy trilogy.
Very nice. Cute ending in particular. This would make a nice illustrated story...
There are a few places where I felt like a word or two could be changed, but unless you feel like going in and fiddling around with them I won't list them all out. On the other hand, if you want me to I will! It's just a handful of slightly awkward phrases.
Yea from me. Good narrative, simple but still entertaining. A fine short story. The repetition reminds me of campfire stories or fairy tales. This would make an excellent addition to the archive.
Joined: Sep 22, 2013 Posts: 5700 Location: Inside my own head
Identity: Human
Concerns
Typo:
Quote:
Instead, he was seeking the another thing that friend had told him about.
Typo:
Quote:
Most people never stopped traveling once they became planeswalker.
The spaces between paragraphs disappear once the dialogue starts up.
Another thing is the mention of 24 hours. I have no knowledge of Mercadia (beyond recognizing that he is on Mercadia), and besides that, I'm not sure most planes are "advanced" enough to use hours to divide the day evenly. If you have evidence that Mercadia does have a 24-hour day, then fine; but otherwise I would change the wording to something less precise.
This line:
Quote:
but as I am certain you know by now,
Is written in first-/ second-person when all the rest if the story is written in third person, and it really stuck out to me.
Overall, I think it accomplishes what you set out to do, but I don't feel one way or the other about it, really. It wasn't... enjoyable, in the sense that I wouldn't care if this story continued. There are parts I did like, but they don't really balance out to make me really invested in the story. For one thing, I kept thinking that something was going to be revealed with the Wishmonger's smile. You make a thing of it but then never go anywhere with it.
Actually, I wonder if it's not that I was reading about the same materials when I was ten as I am now -- not Ari Marmell level, but R.A. Salvatore level, for sure. On the whole, I think I'll have to go with nay.
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