|
Member |
|
Joined: Jun 08, 2016 Posts: 622 Location: noun, a particular place or position
Identity: Protozoan
Preferred Pronoun Set: Soup/Soup's/Soupself
|
Arrogant Gardener
AI Hard 1 - Victory! Excited to play this one. Got the Bloodbriar out on T4, immediately got pumped up to 4/5 thanks to a scion and a clue, promptly Memory’d on the opponent’s turn. Ormendahl, Prince of Profanity was obscenely easy to get out and made short work of my opponent.
-A couple of bogus rounds here; I got a mana flood of ridiculous proportions followed by a round where I sacrificed a Recreational Sage to the Evil Leap, revealing a Bloodbriar and the goddamn game locked up.-
AI Hard 2 - Victory! Okay, so that glitched game above reloaded when I restarted Duels. The computer ignored my block wherein I sacrificed the Sage, but it didn’t matter. I won. No amount of cheating will change that, iPad. Now, if you’ll excuse me, that commercial with all the girls showing off their armpits is on and I need some time to myself
-Computer got a mana screw. Only 2 lands for most of the game. Not a fair test of the deck. Guess I must have a case of glitchburgers. That’s totally a real saying, right?
AI Hard 3 - Victory! Hey, guess what, AI! Maybe when I have a poop tonne of token humans, just maybe I don’t need to tap Westvale Abbey to throw down a Bloodbriar!
Eldrazi/Bloodbriar Ramp
AI Hard 1 - Victory! A bit of a slow start, but between the Anointed Procession, two Anointer Priests and all the token makers I had, by the time Ormendahl and the Decimator of the Province de Quebec came out, it was a comically one-sided victory. From being at 3 life, I finished at 88 to -109.
AI Hard 2 - Loser! It started going bad when the AI got out the Gloryholer, but got worse when I was forced to discard Ulamog. After that, I just tried to keep my head above water, but it was fruitless. Yes, I had no fruit in this battle.
AI Hard 3 - Victory! Easy-peasy, lemon squeezy. Once again, Ormendahl, prince of Profanity comes to the rescue. No real threat and the Bloodbriar was basically an afterthought this round.
Tall, Dork, and Morbidly Obese and a Side-eye at DCG
AI Hard 1 - Victory! A bit of a token race against a Jeskai... thing. In the end, sheer numbers and a giant Bloodbriar and Tireless Tracker put me over the edge with 2 lifes to spare.
AI Hard 2 - Victory! I felt in control the whole time, like DCG was trying to make up for the last contest. This was satisfactory. You hear that, DCG? You have satisfied me!
AI Hard 3 - Victory! What a landslide! My Bloodbriars were 24/25, 26/27, and 28/29 alongside some mid-teens Trackers, a 17/17 Beast from Oviya... there was no contest.
Toke Your Sackins
AI Hard 1 - Victory! So many cats! Annoying Procession a Regal Caracal, some of those life-sucking cats... my allergies were starting to act up before Ormendahl took care of the whole litter, with a Bloodbriar sidekick.
AI Hard 2 - Victory! Hahahahaha! Wha-? Wha-hahahahahaaaaaaa! 316 to -374!!! Aaaah-hahahahahaaa! I durdled only a bit, but Call for Unity, two Stockpiles, six Anointer Priests, a poop-tonne of cats and so damn many servos, not to mention Bloodbriars, Tireless Trackers, and assorted others.
AI Hard 3 - Victory! T6 Ormendahl equals no contest, murrfurrger! I begin to see a pattern that Westvale Abbey seems to be one of the most important cards in all of these decks.
Blood 4 Papa
AI Hard 1 - Victory! At this rate, I’m starting to think everyone was complaining about the Bloodbriar being a bad card for no reason. Realistically, it’s no worse than a Tireless Tracker, except that it doesn’t generate its own saccable permanents. This contest is rigged!
AI Hard 2 -Victory! Blisterpods really get this deck rolling if you drop them and a Bloodbriar in the first few turns.
AI Hard 3 - Victory! Yahenni does his thang. Bloodflow Connoisseur does her thang. In a field of token men and Scroungers, sometimes all it takes is a couple of vampires and a whole lot of determination.
So, this is it for the AI rounds. Shortly, I shall begin to wreck myself on the ladder. From there, I will rank the decks with the following point system
Best to worst: 4, 3, 2, 1, 0 points.
In a sense, every deck is a winner, because you’ve all risen to the challenge, and dared to break a mediocre card. But in another sense, one of you is the biggest loser in this contest and it is the winner’s right to be ridicule you for your abject failure.
_________________
Sshhh! I'm two goblins in a trenchcoat!
|
|