Trolls trolling trolls trolling trolls trolling...
https://youtu.be/GibiNy4d4gc

Oh no they're on to me! I mean, hey guys Red is up on the OP for your review!

-- This space reserved for when I get around to looking at which Red cards I like--

Redrum Review!

Ahn-Crop Crasher - 1.0
This guy could end up being a little bit better or worse than I'm rating it here, but I need to test to figure that out. What it could do cast on curve in a hyper aggressive deck is pretty dirty. What it might end up doing is not being reliable enough to beat out other options in your build. The questions will be how often you're putting down aggressive T1 and T2 creatures that have this partying with them T3, and how often your opponent is casting more than 1 creature by then. Even if it doesn't end up being great, it prob won't be awful since it's something you can cast off curve to nutralize a blocker for lethal if opp stabilized.

Battlefield Scavenger - 0.15
Nah. At least it's a bear tho, so maybe you play it if you don't have much unlocked? If the next set magically gives enough good exert cards that you can build exert.deck, then maybe you want this to make all your doods looters? Prob not.

Blazing Volley - 0.25
Wouldn't have been a terrible sideboard option vs vehicle and token decks last tourney season. Duels doesn't have sideboards tho. No cycle, no shot at maindeck.

Bloodlust Inciter - 0.75
I want to test this guy, but I think he needs haste himself to really be playable. Maybe he'll still be worth playing as a removal magnet that sometimes lets you blast off with a bigger threat, but idk. He's prob worse than I'm thinking.

Bloodrage Brawler - 2.5
We'll be seeing this guy in a lot of red based aggro decks pretty soon. He should be great in RDW, rakdos hellbent, and paired alongside the trample girl in gruul. Fortunately for opponents, he dies to a fair amount of cheap removal giving 2 for 1 opportunities without much additional effort. But in decks that can convert its discard clause to profit or smash face quickly enough to ignore that loss of CA, you're not going to care too much about that.

Cartouche of Zeal - 0.5
On the plus side it's tied for being the cheapest cartouche. It also has a Trial in its color that is pretty decent, particularly if you can recur it. On the other hand, it's buff isn't exciting or particularly suited to a deck that would try to abuse Trials.

Desert Cerodon - 0.10
Trading trample for cycling on Yavimaya Wurm and making it red doesn't make it worth running. New players looking for a 6 mana fatty out of the starter set are better off playing the Wurm.

Electrify - 0.15
Deal 4 damage to a creature at instant speed? Sure! Pay 4 mana for it? No thanks.

Emberhorn Minotaur - 0.15
If you're really set on building minotaur.deck, maybe you use this. That's about it.

Flameblade Adept - 1.0
This is another one I need to test first to know if it's any better than that. It has potential. At worst it's a 1/2 menace for , so it's at least playable in some decks.

Fling - 2.0
Fling is back, and we got it! Crats getting revisited soon. Easier to do Jund version with Fling instead of trying to get that double red for Chandra's Ignition. I think it's even fine (not terrible) for red based aggro decks, that can cast it in response to removal or use it as a surprise finisher after attacks. I know not everyone is high on it, but I'm happy to have it in my deckbuilding toolbox.

Glorybringer - 5.0
Yas! Opp T4 Gideon AoZ and make a token? No problem, let me just cast this next turn to kill both! Planeswalker decks are going to hate seeing this. So will everyone else most likely.

Harsh Mentor - 0.75
Bear that could do more work in the right situation. Better sideboard card than main deck option. I still see Wilds around quite a bit and Vehicles will still be around, so I dont think it's trash. Just not very good. If it punished mana dorks it'd be better.

Hazoret's Favor - 0.25
Maybe has a home in Rakdos steal and sack decks. Will it help make those competitive? Prob not. You can't really even try to build a deck with cheap trampley creatures around it because it's a rare.

Hazoret the Fervent - 3.75
Obligatory "God Bonus" on rating. 2nd best god, and the only other one likely to see a lot of play. Red based aggro will like him at the top of their curve, and he has built in reach. This is one of a few pieces from this set that will draw people back to Rakdos hellbent (if you want to call Rakdos vamps that, tho some builds were def designed to get hellbent asap) after abandoning it when vehicles hit.

Heart-Piercer Manticore - 2.0
Would I like a 4/3 body on my Fling who embalms back to party some more? Sounds good.

Insult // Injury - 2.0
Another one I'll need to test. In theory it's pretty good to nurf Fogs and double up on damage output for a turn. Add some gravy in shock face + shock creature aftermath sounds pretty good too. Worst case top decking this late without much board presence and still being able to cast both sides to deal 4+4 is still pretty darn good. Will it all be enough to earn a spot in the most competitive builds? I'd like to think so, and believe at least it won't be bad to use, but we'll see how this shakes out.

Magma Spray - 1.0
If you're really worried about recurrable.doods, this is a fine option. Problem is it's competing with 1 mana red spells that can hit for 3, or deal same damage but with an option to hit face, so idk how often this makes the cut in people's lists.

Manticore of the Gauntlet - 0.25
That it's a fairly big body that deals 3 to the face when it enters play is nice. That it costs 5 mana, gives a negative counter to one of your doods and you could be playing Glorybringer instead is not nice. Better than some of the other expensive garbage commons in the set tho.

Minotaur Sureshot - 0.15
A sure shot to nopesville, amirite?

Nef-Crop Entangler - 0.25
Hey look! It's that cheap trampler we wanted for building around Hezoret's Favor!

Pathmaker Initiate - 0.5
Lol, Renowned mechanic is pissed we didn't have this when it was relevant. Even the last stragglers like Topan Freeblade in some WW are about to get replaced this set. Pathmaker isn't going to change that. Offers some fringe value to goofy decks so it's not bottom barrel rating, barely.

Pursue Glory - 0.15
Yo dog, what if I took that Start Your Engines card that only sees play in fringe vehicle decks, cut out the part that turns on vehicles BUT ADDED CYCLING - would you want it?!? Not even once.

Thresher Lizard - 0.5
A 3 mana 4/4 for hellbent decks isn't the worst thing you could play. Doesn't mean you should tho.

Trial of Zeal - 1.0
Not a bad Trial, and could be pretty decent if you can recur them. But the more I look at these trials/cartouches, the less I think they'll be a thing that gets played outside JFF decks.

Trueheart Twins - 0.5
Not a terrible effect if you built exert.deck. You won't do that tho.

Warfire Javelineer - 0.5
Part of me wants to like this guy because he's like a Reclusive Artifacer for izzet spells, and if you pack Essence Flux to retrigger you aren't taking deck spots away from things that make it hit harder. Problem is RA hasn't really been with worth playing since Origins, and wasn't really that good then. And why would you put Flux into a creature light spell deck?

Kinda Red: Hazoret's Monument - 0.5
Combos with Drake Haven :trollface:

Top 5 in Red
1) Glorybringer
2) Hazoret the Fervent
3) Bloodrage Brawler
4) Insult // Injury
5) Fling / Heart-Piercer Manticore

Day 4 : Red

Ahn-Crop Crasher: 1.0 I'm going to go ahead and give this a full point because even if Mino tribal is trash, it's still a 3 power haste for 3 which, if exerted, ignores a lone blocker, making it nearly as good as burn. Still worse overall than Exquisite Firecraft which doesn't always make the cut any more, so no higher.

Battlefield Scavenger: 9.3 This is it, the card that will push Drake Haven into broken territory! Kidding. 0.5 is more like it - it does enable various discard triggers, which isn't useless, and it's a bear.

Blazing Volley: 0 If you wanted to make Archfiend of Ifnir's ability terrible, this is how you'd do it.

Bloodlust Inciter: 0.5 Weak to removal himself, but if and when he sticks around he can make a lot of dudes scarier than they normally are.

Bloodrage Brawler: 2.5 Sure, his only trick is being beefy for his size, but that's a lot of beef. With the drawback being a potential upside, he's a new staple for many Red decks not piloted by vegetarians.

Cartouche of Zeal: 1.5 The full set of abilities is actually underpriced, offset somewhat by the granted ability only being useful for one turn. Effective on critters where the extra power does extra work - double strike, menace, trample, etc. Still an aura though.

Desert Cerodon: 0 Nopesville: Population 1. You never go full Craw Wurm.

Electrify: 0 Janky removal for limited.

Emberhorn Minotaur: 0.5 Half a point for when the menace is relevant.

Flameblade Adept: 1.0 1/2 for 1 with potential to grow not to be overlooked, however that potential may be hard to tap into regularly or repeatedly.

Fling: 4.0 Strong response to removal. If you're playing R and you're playing creatures, this should probably be involved.

Glorybringer: 3.5 4/4 flying haste for 5 is already strong, and the exert will take out almost every possible blocker. If not for Harnessed Lightning and Grasp of Darkness, might get 4.0.

Harsh Mentor: 1.0 Hatebear that does nothing vs. the wrong decks and potentially removed easily by those it hurts.

Hazoret's Favor: 1.0 Possibly a decent add to a deck with a lot of death triggers. Having access to repeated haste at nearly any cost is worth a good look. Ultimately expect it to be interesting but not quite good enough.

Hazoret the Fervent: 2.5 (3.0) 5 hasty power for 4, but personal bias leads me to hate having less than two cards in hand often. Still, there's times when that works and Haz is good then. Extra half point is for extra activated ability damage in 2HG.

Heart-Piercer Manticore: 2.5 Stupid 3 toughness, what you ever done for me? Still, 4/3 for 4 and Flings on the way in, meaning potential game winner.

Insult // Injury: 1.0 // 1.5 The fog-killer, suffers from not being a lot of other prevention effects around. Injury isn't quite Hungry Flames, but still 4 for 3 even if on a Sorcery.

Magma Spray: 1.0 Just big enough to be a threat, albeit you'll wish this was Shock when the exile isn't important.

Manticore of the Gauntlet: 1.0 Just a bit too costly for its ability, and 5 is the magic toughness.

Minotaur Sureshot: 0 Nope, not even then.

Nef-Crop Entangler: 0.5 The exert size is nice but slows down the critter unforgivably.

Pathmaker Initiate: 0 Another nope bites the dush!

Pursue Glory: 0 The perfect card to play to express that you hate your life.

Thresher Lizard: 1.0 Not completely thrilled with the cost, but can hit every turn without exert,.

Trial of Zeal: 1.5 3 for 3 at Sorcery isn't stellar, but it comes with a cute Cartouche. Also the best face burn we got this set. Which is sad.

Trueheart Twins: 0.5 One mana too much to be efficient.

Warfire Javelineer: 0 Effect cute, body too smal.

Sorta Red: Hazoret's Monument: 0.50 A hearty source of meh.

Top 5
1. Fling
2. Glorybringer
3. Heart-Piercer Manticore
4. Hazoret, the Fervent
5. Bloodrage Brawler

Man, R really got the shaft this time.

I didn't get to mention on the Podcast, but Fling will probably be my new Gaea's Revenge. 2 untapped mana with a changes the whole dynamic if you're making tall critters.

Nice Geistblast target too!

I'm gonna do red, because its the color that has me most interested in the new set and somebody out there may actually be interested in a self-confessed red fan's opinions.

Ahn-Crop Crasher 2.0
I'm gonna give this card the benefit of the Doubt for now because haste is good and remove a blocker can also be good, though situational. 3/2 for 3cc is ok, about the same as the Grubs (if you dropped them T2), with both your hitting for 6 T3. I've got to test this one before I'm convinced though.

Battlefield Scavenger 0.5
Red has plenty of 2 drops and discard outlets. If the loot was like Copter, draw first, discard later I'd give it 1.0.

Blazing Volley 0.5
Sideboard card? I guess it could be useful against tokens, but that's hardly relevant...

Bloodlust Inciter 2.0
This is a card that can do some work in x decks, not really for mono-red, especially if dropped T1. Hasting your 2, 3, 4, etc drops is relevant and can make a difference in a beatdown deck. It is a bad top-deck later on, but at worst its a Copter pilot.

Bloodrage Brawler 3.0
I'm not 100% solid on this guy yet. Its an under the curve 4/3 2-drop that helps you get hellbent and fire off a madness card. Its actually a good top-deck later on, because if you don't have any cards you don't have to Discard. Still, it is card disadvantage that dies to everything but shock...

Cartouche of Zeal 1.5
This site is loaded with aura-haters, but this and the White cartouches are the best ones. It gets extra points for the being the same color as the red trial, because recurring removal is good. Anyway, looking at the card, +1/+1 and haste is a good deal for . Gonna try it in a boros Sram deck.

Desert Cerodon 0.1
Red cycling cards are few. This is probably for limited only.

Electrify 0.1
If it doesn't hit face, why the f@ck does it cost 4? This would be ok at 2cc. Another limited card...

Emberhorn Minotaur 1.0
Minotaur tribal? Not terrible, but not really the 4-drop red wants either.

Flameblade Adept 3.0
I'm a fan. This card can be gas with all the looting red can do and may just replace good ol' Glory Chaser in a lot of cases. Its a shame that red has very little cycling...

Fling 1.0
I've never been a fan, ever since it first came out in portal or whatever. Its card disadvantage and only really useful as a finisher. For combo decks maybe... I predict you will probably lose at least once to this card during this season.

Glorybringer 4.0
Finally an awesome Dragon card reaches Duels. I was solid on 4/4 flying haste, the removal part is the icing. The only issue I see is that mono-red doesn't really want 5-drops and putting this is that deck will need more Land and will make it slightly more midrangy which is not that deck's comfort zone.

Harsh Mentor 1.0
This card has the potential to punish a lot of decks, but those decks would just kill it asap and its totally vulnerable. Red isn't very good on protecting its creatures and honestly, I haven't found a single deck that could use these guys. Sideboard card?

Hazoret's Favor 1.5
Load of crap? Maybe... I see potential though, especially with all the steal spells red has. Also gas on a Flameshadow token or Impetuous Devils. Its a shame it doesn't give trample though. I can see Scrounger liking it too. Fling also approves.

Hazoret the Fervent 4.5
This is gas. Only Doubt I have is how often will I get to T4 with 4 Land, drop hazoret with <=1 cards in hand. Still, an indestructable source of damage will help to pull out those final few points of damage. Exile effects will be back for the gods, this one especially.

Heart-Piercer Manticore 2.0
Not bad, but not tremendous... 4/3 flinger... With Embalm. Ok, Embalm can be useful, but the game-plan should be to win long before you can use the Embalm. Still, could be a card to ditch to Discard like the firebird, to get back later...

Insult // Injury 3.0
Damage can't be prevented? Double damage? Extra removal in the yard? Oh yes... Probably one of the best split cards we got. Don't be afraid to ditch it to a loot effect, the Insult part is slightly over-priced and is there to kill fog-decks and huge blow-outs you'd probably win anyway.

Magma Spray 1.0
So now you can run 12 1cc red burn only creature spells (not counting lightning axe) and 4 shocks. Overkill? Probably. There aren't too many 2 toughness creatures you want to exile, except Scrounger and Maybe Scrap Trawler. Other options are probably better atm.

Manticore of the Gauntlet 1.0
Same issue as Glorybringer, but a lot less power... Red doesn't really want 5 drops and simply has better options. Could do some work with Flameshadow Conjuring, but too slow...

Minotaur Sureshot 1.0
You've got worse 3-drops but Reach or overcosted firebreathing isn't what you really need. If it had 4 toughness, it could stop Copter and Harvester and could be useful. Not the case.

Nef-Crop Entangler 1.0
2/1 trample... Goes to 3/3 with exert. A good target for a pump, but outclassed by other 2-drops.

Pathmaker Initiate 0.5
Wizards tribal? Nobody plays Subterranean Scout so nobody will play this either.

Pursue Glory 1.0
Cycling! Yay! Start your engines that swaps vehicle activation for cycling. Actually not as bad as it looks, but too expensive to be relevant. I may try it out, because cycling a team pump when its useless is a good idea.

Thresher Lizard 1.5
I admit I looked twice at this card. Vanila 4/4 for 3 isn't bad. Its a card I'll test in the hellbent decks if I can get cardless fast enough.

Trial of Zeal 2.0
Recurring removal? Hell Yeah! Have to build around it? Hmm... Could be good in the right deck (boros cartouches).

Trueheart Twins 0.5
Another uninteresting 5 drop. Exterting for a +1/+0 group pump instead of attacking with a 4/4 next turn? That would only make sense if you have 4+ creatures. Win moar?

Warfire Javelineer 1.0
This reminds me of reclusive artificer, a card that see little play. I guess it could do work in a blink deck as recurring removal but the miniscule body and lack of other relevant abilities reduce the usefulness drastically. Not even for Minotaur tribal.

Sorta Red: Hazoret's Monument 3.0
I must be crazy right? You bet! This is the best of the monuments, making your red dudes cost less is ok, but the looting is the real gas. When your hellbent, you don't want more Land, this can let you filter superquick and keep the pressure high. Taking T3 off for that isn't as bad as it sounds. I'm gonna try it out.
Btw, that cost reduction is exactly what Flameshadow Conjuring wants.

So, top 5:
1st: Hazoret the Fervent 4.5
2nd: Glorybringer 4.0
3rd: Insult // Injury 3.0
4th: Hazoret's Monument 3.0
5th: Bloodrage Brawler 3.0

I don't get the deal with Glorybringer. I mean it's good, but people are hyping it waaaaaaay too much. Its a little expensive to be in a low to the ground aggro deck. Flagship is in the same boat and yet it sees play even in the low to the ground decks , but that's flagship - and despite first impressions this card is no flagship. As for multi color mid range decks, there are better 5 drops. Now if they made it so that the 4 damage could go to face as well ( and made it a mythic ) then I'd be impressed.
Without always watching on board I just don't get the "crazy" hype behind this card.

Insult+ Fling can be good in many decks as a t5-6 finish, just imagine casting Insult, and attacking with a Caravan, that then you can sacrifice for another 10 damage...

And Insult + Injury isn't bad either at 6 mana, killing a big blocker + 4 to the face + double damage for your critters

I have to try Insult in my Gruul Blood Mist/tramplers deck, lol

I think rating fling above 2.0 is too high (maybe less, if we are thinking of Fel's scale). It would be rendered permanently irrelevant by any instant (possibly sorcery) that can do 3 damage to the dome for 2 mana. Calling it anything above a 2, is ignoring that had they given us some of the direct damage spells we've missed, we wouldn't even be considering fling.

As for wether it's relevant or not right now, I think even that is up for discussion. But at least we can fling embalm cards with impunity, which might be a fun way to go.

Get em red mages! Get em!

ITS A MOTHER****ING DRAGON that doesn't suck

Flagship have haste or nah?

Yes... I run it with Thopter Engineer.

Also, the Dragon is probably great!

Green is up on the OP! Go go go!

-- This space reserved for my "extra detailed" examination of the Greens --

Red review (almost overdue):

Ahn-Crop Crasher - 1.0

3/2 Haste for 3 with a relevant ability ain't too bad; but overall we have better 3-drops for aggressive red decks than him. Still, maybe something to look out for if we get more Minotaur tribal support.

Battlefield Scavenger - 0.0

I just think not attacking for the next turn is a too high price to pay just to rummage; and being a 2/2 for 2 is not enough to excite me.

Blazing Volley - 0.0

There's just too many decks against which this is a dead card.

Bloodlust Inciter - 0.0

Of all the possible ways to give haste to your own creatures, this is the worst one; as it's such a bad topdeck late.

Bloodrage Brawler - 3.0

4/3 for 2 is a very good statline, and discarding a card doesn't have to be pure downside. Aggressive decks that want the discard (Hellbent, Madness) absolutely have to consider this.

Cartouche of Zeal - 1.0

This is a way of giving haste I can get behind, as it gives both an immediate and a permanent effect. It does open you up for a 2-for-1 though, and is the Cartouche that works with the Trials the least well.

Desert Cerodon - 0.0

We have better creatures for topend, and Reach through Mists is not a card I'm interested to put into my deck.

Electrify - 0.0

Great Limited removal spell, too expensive for Constructed.

Emberhorn Minotaur - 0.0

The 4-drop slot is at a premium in aggressive decks, and while this card isn't bad it's a far cry away from the bombs you could play there instead.

Flameblade Adept - 3.0

This is the 1-drop aggressive red (or red-black) strategies needed. Menace, often a 2/2 or even bigger.

Fling - 3.0

Really interesting card for them to give us. I have to admit I haven't played with it much, but if we have a home for this card I'm pretty certain it'll do great work for us.

Glorybringer - 4.0

4/4 flying haste with upside works really well in both aggressive decks as a finisher as well as midrange decks as a curve-play. The powerlevel is definitely there; we'll see if Duels can provide a deck for it.

Harsh Mentor - 3.0

Staple in red burn decks; if only because cracking Wilds, crewing Vehicles, activating manlands or shooting damage with Ballista now hurts.

Hazoret's Favor - 1.0

Really unsure about this card. I get the combo with Fling or steal effects, but this is a 3-mana enchantment that leads to even more card disadvantage. I'll err on the side of this card not being very good for now.

Hazoret the Fervent - 3.0

Hazoret will be seen in many aggressive Hellbent/Madness shells. 5/4 Haste attacking turn 4 is no joke, and being able to enable herself while shooting damage is very nice. I like her.

Heart-Piercer Manticore - 2.0

Yet another Fling effect for the SacSteal decks or the Hazoret's Favor decks, if they exist. 4 mana is expensive, but Fling on a maybe recurrable stick ain't that bad.

Insult // Injury - 3.0

Dealing double damage with everything is probably the best team buff a red deck can get, and it even extends to your spells and abilities. Injury as the flipside is very nice as well as it'll be very relevant to finish opponents off more often than not.
Another thing to note is that the card lends itself to being discarded early to still get value of Injury if Insult won't do you much good in the current situation.

Magma Spray - 1.0

Exiling Scrounger and other creatures might be nice, but overall I like this a lot less than most other 1-mana burn spells we have access to as this will never hit something for 3.

Manticore of the Gauntlet - 0.0

I want more out of my 5-drop than this.

Minotaur Sureshot - 0.0

Solid Limied material often means unplayability in Constructed. This is the case here.

Nef-Crop Entangler - 2.0

This is a fairly decent aggressive creature, though it does come with some flaws (1 toughness, for example). Still, you could do worse than attacking for 3 trample on turn 3.

Pathmaker Initiate - 0.0

There's better ways to have a creature get through for damage.

Pursue Glory - 0.0

An overcosted Trumpet Blast is not interesting enough for most aggressive decks; and if you have to cycle this you're probably losing anyways.

Thresher Lizard - 0.0

This is not enough payoff for you being hellbent or close; and a 3/2 for 3 is not exciting.

Trial of Zeal - 1.0

This type of recursion is too slow for most red decks. Maybe there is a deck that actually wants this, but I seriously doubt it.

Trueheart Twins - 0.0

Team-pump on a stick is nothing to sneeze at, 5 mana is a lot though and you already need a bunch of exert creatures in play.

Warfire Javelineer - 0.0

Removal on a stick is solid, but I don't think this will be common with Reclusive Artificer seeing no play at all.

Day 5 : gangGreen

Benefaction of Rhonas - 0.25
Looking at the effect I think, pretty cool, helps with delirium type strategies, lets you dig and maybe net two cards. Then I look at the cost + sorcery speed and wonder how often I'll hit 2 cards and if this gets in delerium decks over Vessels (cause it's not getting in over Grapple)? I'd rather run Gather the Pack if I want something like this.

Bitterblade Warrior - 0.5
A 3/2 deathtouch for 2 mana isn't bad. Only getting that buff when exerted isn't good tho. Otherwise just a bear, and not helped by a creature type that doesn't synergize with humans if you're wanting to build a GW Always Watching exert deck.

Cartouche of Strength - 1
+1 and trample is nice, potentially being removal on top of that is very nice. Paying 3 mana for a potential blowout by removal response isn't nice. But if you play it smart it could be ok to run.

Champion of Rhonas - 1
Your inner Timmy loves this Piper card. Your inner Spike is laughing at your inner Timmy for playing an overcosted 3/3 that he will remove before you untap or have a creature in hand worth exerting for. Some people will play it and have some fun tho.

Crocodile of the Crossing - 1.75
This seems like a very strong curve topper for -/- aggro decks. How good that deck ends up being remains to be seen, and idk how much it gets played outside -/- decks. A hasty 5/4 for 4 is pretty darn good, but a little less so if it has to be a 4/3 or shrink another creature you'd rather not be smaller.

Defiant Greatmaw - 1.5
Another strong card for -/- decks. If that deck doesn't end up being good, I don't think I like it as much as the hasty crock in other types of decks. You have to have a creature you don't care about getting Dead Weight-ed, or you just payed 3 mana for a 2/3. You have to play at least a few other -/- counters creatures for its ability to be useful. Ability would be waaay better if it was 1 for 1 counter reduction or if it cared about -/- counters your opponent puts on it.

Exemplar of Strength - 3.0
A bear with great upside. You're attacking with a 3/3 and and gaining 1 life T3 if you cast this on curve. If you put out a 1 mana creature you don't care about losing T1, you're getting a 4/4 on board T2. That's prettty hawt. Human subtype is relevant. This will see play outside -/- decks.

Gift of Paradise - 1.0
I'm not sure what to make of this yet. If we could run 4 Kiora, this would be very sexy. As is, it's competing with dorks and Pilgrimages and the G//U aftermath spell for 3 mana ramp. It's more vulnerable than the Sorceries and idk how much the 3 life makes up for that. That you get 2 any color mana might make it attractive for 4+ color decks (or 3 colors with a lot of double color spells) tho.

Greater Sandwurm 0.5
With cycling and the ability to not get chumped by weenies, this card is trying hard to get you to play it. But it's 7 mana for a fatty without trample or protection, so you'll play Plated Crusher instead.

Honored Hydra - 2.0
New improved Roar of the Wurm?!? Yes please. Not for every deck, but if your deck can discard it early you'll prob want this in it.

Hooded Brawler - 0.5
A 5/4 for 3 is pretty good. Having to exert it to not be a 3 mana 3/2 isn't good. See: Bitterblade Warrior.

Initiate's Companion - 0.25
If you build a tribal cat deck, this prob has a spot in it. Otherwise it won't.

Mouth // Feed - 1.5
A 3/3 token for 3 isn't awful. Drawing cards isn't bad. Feed side is kind of like a cross between Elemental Bond and Armorcraft Judge. if you can at least draw 2 cards reliably, then it's prob worth running - otherwise prob not. The fact you're getting 2 spells on one card slot helps tho.

Oashra Cultivator - 0.15
If you need an early blocker that can ramp you, you'll run Driud of the Cowl instead. If you really want a land fetched in play and don't want to pay 4 for it in one turn, you'll run Nissa's Pilgrimage. If you only have the starter set and this, you should just pay the 4 mana in one pop and run Explosive Vegetation instead.

Ornery Kudu - 0.25
Only worth considering in -/- counters decks, and not good enough to beat out other 3CMC options in those decks.

Pouncing Cheetah - 0.5
Flash keeps this from being completely bad. Spirit of the Hunt is better, and Bounding Krasis much better. Even if you're trying counter/flash, this isn't beating out other options for a spot.

Prowling Serpopard - 1.75
Effect that's only great in very specific matchups. Great sideboard card, but it's body/manacost isn't bad for maindecks either. Value will depend on how much the new blue counterspells revive those decks, and could be higher rating if we see a proliferation in those decks on the ladder.

Quarry Hauler 0.5
The camel with teeth as sharp as a giant dragon. Doesn't fly tho, and it's hard to get excited about that ability. Not making the cut in -/- counters decks, and if I really want a creature that can add a loyalty counter to my Planeswalkers, I'd prefer the blue flying guy for 2 mana.

Rhonas the Indomitable - 5.0
Obligatory "God Bonus". Best god in the set. As the only thing you NEED to have in play to turn it on is a bear, it's the easiest God to turn on (at least on curve). I see this in every deck that runs a good number of creatures and has green in it. If you're building that type of deck, you'll have to think of reasons NOT to run it.

Sandwurm Convergence - 1.5
I'm stoked for this card. I will be trying it in Simic/Gruul/Temur/Selesnya ramp decks. Cost is way too high to try it in anything else tho. Good chance it's not good enough to even run in ramp decks, but def worth trying.

Shed Weakness - 0.5
You could get a 3 point buff with it in -/- counters decks, making it effectively Giant Growth. I just don't see why you'd run this over Blossoming Defense.

Synchronized Strike - 0.75
A decent combat trick that works well with Exert. Exert.deck isn't contending any time soon tho. While this card could lead to some surprise block blowouts, it's a tad pricey for a combat trick and you need 2 creatures in play to get the most out of it. Not awful, but too situational to see much play I think.

Trial of Strength - 1.0
A 4/2 for 3 isn't bad, and if you can recur it it's pretty solid. If you can't recur it and/or you're not playing a deck that cares about tokens, you have better things to spend 3 mana on.

Watchful Naga - 0.15
Elvish Visionary is better. If you want to spend 3 mana for a 2-butt creature that can draw a card, play Rogue Refiner instead.

Not quite Green Rhonas's Monument - 3.0
The creature ramp from Monuments matters most for green. The trigger on creature casts is pretty darn good and helps insure Rhonas is turned on. Best monument IMHO. The white one could be crazy in certain types of decks, but you can pretty much throw this in any creature based deck and have it do work. Not an autoinclude of course, but worth considering at least.

Top 5 in Green
1) Rhonas the Indomitable
2) Exemplar of Strength
3) Rhonas's Monument
4) Honored Hydra
5) Prowling Sepepord

I guess one thing to be said for Red is that it can probably do Sacdos without the dos part any more - there's enough R ways to sacrifice dudes that B should be largely unnecessary, or splashed just for Disintegrate/Bone Splinters.

Day 5 : Green

Benefaction of Rhonas: 0 Only getting maybe one card out of five for three mana and dumping the rest in the grumper? Delirium or reanimator maybe, but they have better options with less chance of screwing them.

Bitterblade Warrior: 0.5 A bear with the added option of getting +1 and deathtouch in a situation you're prepared to lose it in anyhow, making the exert a non-cost. Still, probably better things to do with your 2 slots.

Cartouche of Strength: 0 Overpriced, Nature's Way makes better removal, and the minor buff not really worth it until late game on bigger dudes. Pass.

Champion of Rhonas: 1.5 Yeah, it's a Hill Giant, but if you keep that in mind and include combat tricks, it'll probably go off at least once, and that will oftentimes be enough.

Crocodile of the Crossing: 2.0 Mono-G hastiness 5 damage for 4 mana in the best case, 4/3 in the worst. Bonus if you're trying the Nest of Scarabs deck with this.

Defiant Greatmaw: 1.0 Another Nest candidate, can also "heal" other critters and comes down potentially big. Possibly Leatherback Baloth if you don't mind having a -1/1 Druid.

Exemplar of Strength: 1.5 Niche card in the Nest deck, really bad late game in anything else. On curve you get a bear that grows once or twice. That's not super exciting when the opponent almost has to be asleep to trigger it. Pretty much only interesting if you have a 1 drop to throw the counters on to, in which case you're accepting card disadvantage for a wanna-be Tarmogoyf. Aggro players might be more thrilled than me.

Gift of Paradise: 1.5 It's ramp, it's fixing, it's a little lifegain, and it is going to do shenanigans with Kiora. There's the dream of T2 Druid, T3 Weaver of Currents, T4 tap Weaver and G for this, aiming at one of 3 remaining lands, tap all for Kiora, untap Weaver and Gifted land for where you can do Bounty of the Luxa, Explosive Vegetation, most versions of Nissa, or other silliness. T5 you have access to 11 or more mana, depending what you did T4. Granted, this won't come up often with Kiora being a mythic, but you're probably well on your way to an auto-win when this sort of thing happens.

Greater Sandwurm: 0 Niggity-naggity-NOPE. Not when Plated Crusher and Gaea's Revenge both exist.

Hooded Brawler: 0 This has less to do with gangsta boxing rings than the name implied and that was only the first of many disappointments with this card.

Honored Hydra: 3.5 It's Roar of the Wurm with Trample. That's a feisty little card there, even if it just eats two removal spells.

Initiate's Companion: 0 This would be cute with a Gifted land if it had any chance of getting through. To NOPE and beyond!

Mouth // Feed: 3.0 // 2.0 Half Call of the Herd, half one-shot Elemental Bond, with a possibility of card advantage. I also like the idea of Rishkar's Expertise into this, as unless your opponent kills a dude, you'll start the next turn with at least two qualifying dudes for Feed.

Oashra Cultivator: 0 All aboard the Nope train! No one wants a worse Diligent Farmhand. Hell, we stopped running that once Sakura-Tribe Elder was a thing.

Ornery Kudu: 0 Nopey McNoperson called for his card back. This is never better than Defiant Greatmaw.

Pouncing Cheetah: 0 N-N-N-N-NOPEBO! We have better versions of this.

Prowling Serpopard: 3.0 Don't feel bad about this getting a solid 3. Ignoring that the ability is only useful in certain matchups, I expect counters to make a comeback, and will say that's a REALLY day-ruining ability when it kicks in. Plus, we can stop having new creature types, because nothing is ever beating Catsnek. Worse case scenario, you've got a 4/3 for 3 on a rare. Pretty likely to trade up.

Quarry Hauler: 1.0 4/3 for 4 is significantly less impressive in G. Other colours might snap that up, but the ability can futz with +, -, loyalty, brick, or other types of counters, including counter types not yet released. I expect this to be a small piece in a semi-broken deck in the future.

Rhonas the Indomitable: 5.0 Think this is the second 5 I've given out? Well, despite that Deathtouch is useless 90% or more of the time on a five power guy, he can swing as early as turn 4 with a bear in play T2 and pumping it. Just big enough to dodge Languish, easy to turn on/keep on, counts for Feed/Rishkar's even if he can't currently attack, etc. Splashable to boot. Unless the only reason G is in your deck is to cast Fog, there's pretty much no excuse not to run this.

Sandwurm Convergence: 2.0 Personal bias, and I want this to be better than it is. Still, the effect is worth ramping in to; it gives you inevitability as a win condition and stops the flying guys that give so many other G decks problems. Of course Heaven // Earth probably solves that for less mana, but this is a package deal.

Shed Weakness: 0 Nopeasaurus Rex sez; the best way to shed weakness is to cut this card from your deck.

Synchronized Strike: 0 Whether it's a shoddy version of Invigorated Rampage or the bad part of Blessed Alliance, the point is it's crapper version of better cards. To the Nope League with you!

Trial of Strength: 1.0 The tiny butt on these tokens kills them for me almost as much as it does Sir Mix-A-Lot, but if you're building a Cartouche/Trial deck, these work well with the U/W Cartouches and/or Anointed Procession. Still nothing to get excited about, but hey.

Watchful Naga: 0 Can watch from the sideline, 'cause NOPE, I need bigger than 2/2 from my 3 slots in G.

Not quite Green Rhonas's Monument: 2.5 While this is probably the best colour to take advantage of the cost reduction, the trigger helps Rhonas stay awake (all the gods are caffeine addicts, you see...) and forces opponent to use most size-based removal in response, so nice to avoid nasty combat tricks if you cast first main.

Partial Greens (not previously reviewed); Spring // Mind 1.0 // 1.0 While Spring is overcosted by one and Mind is overcosted by two, getting both effects from one Delirium-friendly card slot will be nice in a deck or two.

Prepare // Fight 0.5 // 0 A mediocre combat trick stapled to the worst Fight card ever? Would you like fries with your Nopeburger?

Heaven // Earth 1.5 // 2.0 Two sweepers, one cheaper and instant, the other more applicable but slower, but the select-a-size nuke nature of these makes it very possible to set up one-sided situations, and Heaven gets the bonus of being a surprise. Unless we get Silklash Spider at some point, this may be some of the best anti-flying tech G ever gets.

Top 5:
1. Rhonas the Indomitable
2. Honored Hydra
3. Mouth // Feed
4. Prowling Serpopard
5. Rhonas's Monument

Of note is that G got the most 0 pans from me so far. It got a lot of trash, but it's also in a colour that's hard to print useful new dudes for in an eternal format. The stuff it did get is fairly mighty (and a lot of its best stuff is multicoloured), but falls off sharply after the top 5 or 6. Then again for a constructed eternal format, getting 5-6 playables per set isn't awful.

I'm slowly catching up on the thread and I saw it mentioned that I missed Plague Belcher on the Black list on the OP. I have fixed it.

BTW anyone know what is going on with the autocard for Cruel Reality?

It's working for me (right now at least). Bloodrage Brawler doesn't for some reason (goes to the page fine, but I only see the back when hovering). There was at least one card that did the same thing last season - Yahenni's Expertise IIRC. Not sure why.