What Love Requires
It was not until Kimberley had sat down for breakfast that she realized how surreal the situation was.
Lord Eijo had finally made an appearance, but besides a small greeting, had said little else. Jin had prepared most of the meal while Kimberley sat across a low table from Lord Eijo. All the while, Jin had made small talk with his father and Kimberley. She could claim to be many things, but attentive in the morning was not one of them, and it was not until Jin had placed some steaming rice dish in front of her that she woke up enough to become uncomfortable.
She could not remember ever having shared breakfast with… anyone. Not even Jinsen, come to think of it. They rarely ate together at all, since Jinsen’s appetite was sporadic at best. She had certainly not shared breakfast with anyone in so… intimate a setting. Was this normal?
Lord Eijo murmured his thanks and lifted the bowl, though evidently, he was waiting for it to cool and nursing a cup of tea. Jin dug in immediately. Kimberley’s stomach churned. Everything was very quiet all of the sudden, with only the clink of utensils and the muted sounds of the world outside. She could hear birds. Her hand began to tighten into a fist against her thigh, and she had to will it to be still. This- This was normal. Nothing bad was going to happen. Nothing-
“This must be strange for you, Miss Talon.” Lord Eijo noted before raising the small cup to his lips and taking a sip. Kimberley’s eyes flicked to Jin, who was watching her with raised eyebrows and gave her a small smile. Was… Lord Eijo a telepath? “I can’t read your mind.” Lord Eijo said immediately. “I am simply observant, and Kymoko has seen that look many times before.”
“...Kymoko?” Kimberley prompted, not sure what else to say. Lord Eijo nodded, and set down his cup.
“I see what Kymoko sees.” He informed her, and she mentally congratulated herself for guessing that correctly the first time she had come to Kamigawa. “And I remember what Kymoko remembers. Nothing happens in this village that I am not aware of.”
Kimberley thought for a moment that such an arrangement was amusing, if strange, but stopped before she said anything. Then, remembering yesterday, she felt her face heating up. Beside her, Jin sighed.
“Father.” He warned flatly as Kimberley stared at her lap. Lord Eijo chuckled.
“Forgive me, Miss Talon.” Lord Eijo said. “Your embarrassment is not my intention.”
Kimberley nodded, silently accepting his apology, and Jin returned to eating his breakfast, albeit rather subdued. Kimberley still did not have the stomach to do more than pick at hers, and Lord Eijo began eating, slowly. Jin, understandably, was the first to finish his food. As soon as he had set his bowl down on the table, Lord Eijo spoke again.
“Jin, why don’t you tend to your garden?” He suggested immediately. Jin watched his father with a guarded look and a thin mouth, but nodded and reached for his bowl. “I’ll clean up here, my son.” Lord Eijo interrupted. “Thank you for the meal.” Jin hesitated, but stood stiffly, and glanced at Kimberley. She returned his look with a bemused expression, but waved him goodbye anyway. Not very subtle of the old man, sending Jin away, but it was clear Lord Eijo wanted to talk to her. No need to insist that Jin stick around.
Jin made his exit with a bow, and the low table was filled with the sort of tension that finally set Kimberley’s stomach at ease. Now, at least, it was obvious something was going to happen, and she knew the source of her uneasiness. She decided not to think too hard about the fact that imminent problems were comforting to her.
“He’s very… obedient.” Kimberley noted once she was sure Jin was out of earshot. Strangely, Lord Eijo wore the same expression that Jin had last night, when she had broached the subject of his father.
“Indeed.” Lord Eijo agreed, setting down his bowl. “He will make a fine leader of this village one day.” Kimberley frowned.
“Is that the problem?” She demanded immediately. “You don’t think I’m… good enough for him?” And although the thought of being judged so harshly made her angry, she secretly hoped that, maybe, Lord Eijo would confirm this for her. It would be… devastating, but at least she would be free of the fear of disappointing Jin.
Lord Eijo stared at her without blinking. She felt the defiance leave her face, and she had to look away from his milky-white gaze.
“On the contrary, I think you’re perfect for my son.” Lord Eijo said, and Kimberley’s heart tightened. “He takes everything very seriously. You show him that life is to be enjoyed, not just endured. He has been refreshingly gentle since meeting you. You have my thanks, Miss Talon.”
Kimberley put her face in her hands to hide how red she was becoming. Honestly, she was absolutely mortified, because she had done nothing to deserve such praise! Let alone his thanks! Parents were supposed to… Protect their children, right? She did not have much firsthand experience with that, but she had read about it! Lord Eijo should have been indignant, or… something. Anything, other than this.
Why was he being so nice to her?
Lord Eijo sipped his tea, and then cleared his throat.
“Actually, it is not Jin I wanted to speak with you about.” He said as Kimberley sighed and composed herself. Alright, so there was something wrong. “Jinsen asked me to oversee your training while he was away. I admit, I’ve seen him perform his Eight Katas often enough to have memorized them, even without Kymoko’s perfect memory. I cannot do much in the way of demonstration, but I could perhaps be of assistance.”
Kimberley sighed. Familiar territory - her inability to learn basic techniques. This, she could work with.
“I’d appreciate that.” She told him neutrally, finally deciding to begin eating her breakfast. It was surprisingly sweet for what looked like a bowl of white mush. It probably would have been tastier had she eaten it hot.
“Tell me about your training, then.” Lord Eijo prompted, and Kimberley filled him in on what she knew in between bites. He seemed pleased that she had mastered the movements of four Katas, and as she described her troubles with the Fifth, he simply smiled knowingly and nodded.
“I know how I can help.” He informed her, and gestured to her now empty bowl. She handed it to him automatically. “I’m sure you’d like to freshen up.” Lord Eijo observed, and Kimberley wrinkled her nose. Yes, but she did not enjoy having it pointed out. “Go and prepare for the day how you please. If you have questions about the location of the bath, ask Jin. He’s in the garden.” She stood up awkwardly, thinking that if this was how breakfast was normally going to be, she might just have to sleep in. As she prepared to leave, Lord Eijo stopped her. “Meet me in the dojo once you are ready. Jin can direct you there as well.”
“Um, yes. Alright.” Kimberley cleared her throat. “Thank you.”
She decided not to think about her retreat as fleeing, and instead resolved never to be caught in such an awkward situation ever again. The worst part was that Jinsen was not even here to stare at her discomfort blankly so that she could make jokes about him being out of touch. She could not help but feel that maybe this whole situation would have been easier with Jinsen’s calming presence somewhere around her.
Well. He would not be around forever. Maybe it was better to get used to that early.
Kimberley found the baths without having to go to Jin, thankfully. If Jin asked questions about her conversation with his father she might have actually died of embarrassment. She was so distracted constructing mortifying scenarios in her mind that she did not think about how long it had been since she had a hot bath until she was already in the water. Shocked, she found herself sitting stiffly in the wooden tub before the heat caused the tension in her shoulders to ease and she slouched down with a contented sigh.
When she noticed the lavender soap nearby she nearly started crying.
Fortunately, she kept herself together which was a small victory in itself. She decided to stay in the bath until the water was lukewarm and she was beginning to prune, mostly because she was enjoying herself too much but partially because she was delaying her visit to Lord Eijo’s dojo. It would probably be rude to delay much longer.
As she toweled dry, she noticed a nearby polished bronze mirror, complete with a comb and brush. She blinked at it, curious, because… Well, because neither Jin nor Lord Eijo had any hair. She wrapped the towel around herself and inspected the objects. They were not dusty. Had these been set out for her? That was considerate. Kimberley dreaded to think what sort of snarled mess her hair must have been in to prompt such kindness. Or maybe they just thought she was vain.
Well, they were right. Kimberley grinned as she brushed her hair properly for the first time in recent memory, making faces in the mirror as she did so. One day, she would have her own room somewhere, with her own things, she decided. For the time being, however, she was dedicated to following Jinsen around, wandersome though he may be. Thinking about it, she did not know how he would react if she told him that she was leaving. Not that she wanted to.
But it was hard to think of Jinsen getting violent with her. Really, it was hard to think of Jinsen getting violent with anyone, despite the stories. Maybe none of them were true.
Kimberley shook her head. Focus. Lord Eijo’s dojo. It was time to go.
She almost resigned herself to putting on her old, travel worn clothes when there was a small knock at the bathhouse door that nearly startled her off her feet. Frowning, she stepped carefully over to the door and opened the slat at eye level. No one. They must have beat a hasty retreat. Still, Kimberley was curious, so she unlatched the door and peered out. On the floor in front of the door was a pile of what appeared to be clothes. Kimberley grinned, snatched the clothing, and closed the door once more.
It appeared to be cotton, for the most part, although there was a white silk sash that she ran through her fingers. It took her a few tries to figure out where all the pieces went, or how they fit together, but eventually she was standing in front of the mirror wearing a soft, blue tunic and trousers. With the sash tied around her waist, she admitted she looked rather fetching. She was not sure what the symbol that was embossed over her heart stood for, though. She would ask Eijo when she arrived.
She left her old clothes folded up for retrieval later, and went to get her blade from her room. She did not hear or meet anyone on her way there, nor did she hear or meet anyone as she wandered the manor for a solid fifteen minutes trying to find the dojo. When she finally did find it, mildly annoyed, Lord Eijo called her in from behind the sliding door as she approached.
He really wanted to rub in that “all-seeing” thing. Well, Kimberley supposed she would do the same in his shoes. Kimberley entered the dojo, closing the door behind her.
It was a simple room. Three windows, four wooden walls, and a paper sliding door. The floor was covered in some sort of reed mat. Lord Eijo stood at the opposite end, and bowed to her as she entered. Kimberley returned the gesture hesitantly, and Lord Eijo smiled encouragingly.
“Much more respectful than last time, Miss Talon.” Lord Eijo commented, putting his arms behind his back. “I should tell you that Kymoko is pleased.”
“I’m… glad.” Kimberley replied cautiously. “I’d hate to displease them.”
“So would I.” Lord Eijo gestured to her blade without expanding on his comment. “May I?” he asked.
“Oh. Of course.” Kimberley agreed, stepping towards Lord Eijo. Before she had taken more than two steps, he gestured for her to stop, and then made a beckoning motion. Kimberley found that contradictory for a moment, and then her blade floated out of its sheath and towards the Lord of Kymoko.
Right. Kami metal. Of course he would be able to control it.
“I see you’ve already put it together.” Lord Eijo mused as the blade hovered in front of him, turning over and over. “Yes, I have mastery over this blade. It is part of Kymoko, and so, is part of me.” That made Kimberley feel a little uneasy and admittedly possessive. That blade was hers! Not… she sighed and schooled herself. Now was not the time to think about things being unfair. Lord Eijo had been more than hospitable. If Lord Eijo noticed her thoughts, he did not comment on them. “Tell me, Miss Talon - have you ever been wounded?”
Kimberley blinked. Was. That a threat?
“Um. No.” Kimberley replied shortly. “Not… I mean, not in the way you mean. Not in the way I think you mean. I’ve cut myself a few times, gotten some bad bruises, but…” But, she was always careful. 'Do not anger people with weapons' had always been her motto, and what she could not outrun, she could definitely outcharm. Usually.
“I would not recommend it.” Lord Eijo told her, though his voice was humorless. “However, it is the fear of impaling yourself that keeps the fifth Kata from your grasp.” Kimberley’s blade suddenly flipped, and was point-first, directly at Lord Eijo’s belly. His hand was still raised. Kimberley tried her best not to appear alarmed. She knew from experience how sharp her blade was. “The final motion is visceral. Dishonored samurai sometimes kill themselves with a similar motion. The death is slow, agonizing, and ultimately, inevitable. A flick of the wrist…” Lord Eijo waved his hand, and the sword spun about, with the tip now facing her. “...and a similar fate could befall you.” Kimberley folded her arms.
“Are you going to stab me?” She demanded. “I don’t think Jinsen would be very happy about that.” Lord Eijo raised an eyebrow.
“You jump so quickly to the worst possible outcome.” He observed. “I have shown you hospitality, generosity, and mercy. I have been nothing but kind. Still, you would think this of me.” If he was upset by his accusation, he did not show it. His voice remained low and without menace. Kimberley, however, was beginning to wilt. How was this supposed to help, exactly? She knew she was being ungrateful and paranoid, but that did not have anything to do with her training.
“I get it. I’m a bad person.” Kimberley grumbled.
“Your words, and not mine.” Lord Eijo told her. “But no, I do not believe you are a bad person. Simply a scared one. In the right situation, the difference can save your life. If you are a bad person, and someone wrongs you, you would do anything to spite them. A scared person simply runs away.”
Kimberley did not know what to say to that, and so kept her mouth shut. He was right, of course.
“You are afraid of your own sword.” Lord Eijo continued. “And you must not be. In battle, it is your only companion, your constant ally. If you do not trust it, accept it, and believe in it, it will fail you.”
“You make it sound as though it’s alive.” Kimberley pointed out. Lord Eijo smiled.
“All wielded weapons are.” Kimberley’s weapon vibrated momentarily. “This one more than most.” A living sword? Great. With her luck, it would start talking to her. “But, for all it’s life, it will do nothing that you do not command it. It will not be your sword that harms you. It will be yourself.”
Kimberley spread her hands wide, staring at Lord Eijo with an expectant nod of her head.
“How does any of that help me?” She asked, letting her hands fall limply back to her sides. “I already knew that.”
“You knew, yes, but you did not accept it.” Lord Eijo told her solemnly. “You blame the sheathe, or the blade, or your lack of skill. Well, the sheathe is well-crafted, the sword is exquisite, and you are talented. What else would it be, then, but your fear?”
Kimberley sighed.
“I see why Jinsen likes you.” She said to Lord Eijo. “You both say some of the most cryptic things.”
Lord Eijo gave her a knowing smile.
“I doubt that is the only reason the Lotus ‘likes’ me, Miss Talon.” Lord Eijo commented, before flicking his wrist and floating her sword back towards her, and then gestured for her to take it. As she did, Lord Eijo continued speaking. “You will perform the Fifth Kata, but you will do so with your eyes closed. The first time you fail, I will summon Jin so he can watch you. If you fail again, I will begin asking inappropriate and embarrassing questions about the both of you.”
“What?” Kimberley yelped, face heating up at the thought of being interrogated like that. “I- What is that supposed to accomplish!?”
Lord Eijo chuckled, and shrugged.
“You need something else to be afraid of, and that seems harmless enough.” His eyes seemed to twinkle despite the milky whiteness. Creepy. “If you do not fail, you have nothing to worry about.”
“That’s-”
“Perfectly reasonable, I know.” Lord Eijo interrupted, waving his hand. “Begin, please.”
Kimberley let out a slow, annoyed breath, but closed her eyes and concentrated. Alright. Like he had said, if she did not fail, there was nothing to be afraid of. She just had to get it right the first time. No fear. Left, right, raise the blade, symmetry, strike, stand… sheathe…!
She missed.
Lord Eijo snorted, but Kimberley kept her eyes closed. Well, she probably had a few more attempts before Jin showed up, so-
“Father.” Jin said, and Kimberley heard the door behind her open up. She barely suppressed a groan. He had summoned Jin before she had even started. Unbelievable. “You needed something…?”
“Yes, come in.” Lord Eijo said amicably. Kimberley opted to keep her eyes closed and reset her stance. “Kimberley is practicing. She requested you be here to watch.” Kimberley clenched her teeth, trying to fight the heat creeping up her neck. She had not! Ugh, Jin was going to think she was being vain. Lord Eijo had literally planned all of this. She could tell.
She really should not have been so snippy with him earlier.
“Oh. Of course!” Jin said enthusiastically. “Thank you, Kimberley. It will be enlightening to see the Lotus’ teachings in practice.”
Kimberley hummed and nodded, but still, remained blind to the world around her. She doubted she could bear to look at Jin right now, anyway. Ok. No problems if she just did it right this time. Swing, raise, strike…
She missed.
She could practically hear Lord Eijo’s grin in the smug sound of his voice.
“Jin, Kimberley was telling me how attractive she thinks you are.”
Kimberley almost fell over.
“W- what? I, uh, I mean…” Jin stammered as Lord Eijo laughed. Kimberley tried not to snarl as Lord Eijo began to expound on what “she” had told him. It was going to be a long day.
***
Jinsen meditated for the three days while the “Children of the Lotus” gathered. He demanded that he not be disturbed, and the sequestered himself in the shadow of Isawa’s carriage. It had been a favorite spot of his when he still lived among Clan Nurima, and though he chided himself for the sentimentality, he took comfort in the familiarity all the same. Even if Isawa had betrayed him - betrayed everything he wished to be - she would not poison the few happy memories he still had. Thus situated, Jinsen fell into himself, to find purpose in the path life had set before him.
Mostly, he examined and removed himself from the anger and the hurt he felt at Isawa’s “boon”. From her perspective, the choice was perfectly reasonable, if perhaps desperate. It had been the bloody path Jinsen himself had cut through the Mad King’s War that had led to stories of his exploits being told. He had always thought of himself as a cautionary tale, but the Kor had whispered him onto a pedestal, and made him a legend. The times had been dark, and his actions could have been construed as heroic. He was what the Kor had needed then, in the face of a madman’s hate. After the death of Mairth - after the end of the war - they should have forgotten him, like any weapon.
Instead, they decided to worship a sword, and would dare to be surprised when it cut them.
Jinsen knew if he ever returned here, it would probably come to this. Of his own volition, or not. His memory was too corrupted, too bloodstained, to be anything but a detriment to the Kor. If they revered him, they condoned his violence. But if they shunned him… He had saved them too many times to be shunned, however. Killing the Children of the Lotus in cold blood would forever mar his legend. He would become the cautionary tale he always wanted to be.
He had killed enough people during the war, that this should not be the case. But, it was. Jinsen did not fool himself into thinking he was doing this for the greater good. He did not fool himself into thinking he was doing this to avert war. He was doing this because it needed to be done, and as it always had been, he was the only one who could do it.
With that thought, his mind froze, and fell into the lake of his soul, before drifting. A small measure of peace.
Jinsen was roused from his meditation twice by Sojinrei bringing a thin broth into Isawa’s carriage. No doubt now that Isawa had served her purpose and summoned the Eightfold Lotus, she would be given a lethal dose of whatever poison Sojinrei had been administering. Jinsen briefly entertained the thought of ending Sojinrei’s duplicity then and there, but he stepped outside of himself and examined the urge until it vanished entirely. Isawa’s plan would fail if he acted rashly, and it was too late to save her anyway. There was only her vengeance left for her.
After the second time Sojinrei came, and then left, he did not come back. Jinsen no longer heard Isawa’s thin heartbeat against the wood.
If an announcement was made, Jinsen was too far adrift to hear it. He did not stir again until the three days had past. When he did, it was with his resolve intact, and with clarity of purpose.
Isawa’s carriage was obviously still in place. If they had moved her body to be interred, he did not know. He had little desire to see her corpse. It would be little without her spirit within it. He wished that he could take the carriage with him. It would be interesting to have a roof over his head wherever he wandered for a change. Kimberley might appreciate it. Interestingly, while he was meditating, someone had taken the opportunity to move several other carriages in a large circle around Isawa’s carriage, creating a walled off circle. An impromptu meeting area. He took note of his surroundings quickly. One entrance, a few lower carriages. A quick or desperate Kor may be able to leap over. He would have to be vigilant.
As he thought this, Kor began trickling in, led by Sojinrei. The Children of the Lotus, no doubt. Jinsen turned his attention fully to each person who entered, making sure to make eye contact with them and gauge their reactions to his stare. Most bowed deferentially. Some looked away, afraid. Awe and fear. Nothing had changed. Jinsen stood in front of the door to Isawa’s carriage - as close to the center of the circle as anything else - and folded his arms behind his back.
All of the Kor were young. Far younger than him. None had shaved heads, though most had weapons. He saw signs of a few apprentices, but no full-fledged warriors of any given discipline, and certainly no Weapon Masters. Jinsen breathed in deeply, and then out again. Isawa had sent him to slaughter children. Dangerous children, maybe, but children nonetheless.
Eventually, Kor stopped arriving. There were thirty-six of them. Jinsen gazed over the gathered men and women, face placid. The outcome of this battle was assured. He did not have it in him to strike without warning though. He would give them a chance to make peace.
Sojinrei looked like he was about to say something, but Jinsen was not sure his patience would outlive the sound of that man’s voice. Instead, Jinsen spoke.
“I have three questions for all of you.” He barely had to raise his voice for it to carry, such was the quiet. “The answer to the previous will change the question that follows. In this way I will test your worth.” The young Kor watched him with what appeared to be a mixture of apprehension and anticipation. He saw their faces, the way they shifted nervously. He felt the tension in the air. No one expected to see the Eightfold Lotus again. No one knew what would happen next. Not truly.
Jinsen closed his eyes.
“Who am I?” He called out, turning his head so that he could listen to their answers with his favored ear. There was a moment's hesitation, followed by several voices calling out.
“The Lotus.”
“The Eightfold Lotus.
“Yes, the Lotus.”
Jinsen’s heart clenched, but he remained calm. It was as he thought. They did not know his name. They did not know who he was, or what he stood for.
“What does the Eightfold Lotus do?” Jinsen asked, and with a sigh, opened his eyes once more. None had answered correctly the first time. The next two questions hardly mattered at all.
“You defend us.”
“Destroys our enemies.”
“Protects the Kor.”
Jinsen let his hands fall, limp, loose, and defeated to his sides. They would never learn. The Kor would never learn, unless he did this. It was the only way to send the message. War begets war. Violence breeds violence. Jinsen was a creature of death. Now, they would remember it.
“You have misspoken.” Jinsen told them, and allowed a ripple of disconcertion to flow through those gathered. “I see many of you, from many different clans. I see Nurima and Chorano. Desana, Ujuwei, and Imkuro. I see apprentices of the Iron Tide, the Winds of Manaan, and the Three-Point Star. And yet, you would leave those behind, and become the children of a man whom you do not know. Your ignorance disgraces you.” There was now a more palpable rumble of outrage, but Jinsen did not give them a chance to reply. “You expect I will lead you to battle against the humans, but you know nothing about me. The only thing the Kor remember of me is my strength.”
“That’s because you are strong!” Sojinrei shouted confidently, taking a step forward. Jinsen clenched his teeth.
“And I would never sire a weakling such as you!” Jinsen snapped, and just like that, everything fell silent. “None of you are my children.” Jinsen informed them all quietly. “Your answers were wrong. I am Nurima Jinsen. I kill people, and I have just one more question for you.”
Jinsen drew his blade, took a deep breath, and widened his stance.
“How would you like to die?”
As soon as the words left his mouth, he focused on the cold steel of his katana, and let the noise of the sudden panic and anger of the gathered Kor fade into the background. Some of the Kor closest to the entrance were already moving, trying to get away. They did not speak, but still, they answered his question. They were telling him they would like to die on their bellies.
He obliged.
As he was removing his blade from the first of the Children, the horrified shouts increased, and he heard steel being drawn. So, some would like to die fighting. Honorable. Jinsen sidestepped several thrown daggers, simultaneously cutting down a Kor who attempted to run past him. Jinsen had closed the gap between Isawa’s carriage and the entrance too quickly. Soon, some would try to climb the walls, but for now the cowardly had backed away, afraid. They would remain in his awareness, and die last.
For now, he simply moved like a serpent through the slow, clumsy assault of those Children who thought to lay him low. Step, strike, slide, strike, duck, kick, strike. The battle - such as it was - was seamless, all motion clear as a still pond to him. Nothing was small enough to escape his notice, and he remained untouched. Seven seconds later, the nine Kor with weapons lay dead.
Save for Sojinrei, who Jinsen had disarmed rather literally. He still had words for that boy.
The cowards among the Children were probably begging, but he did not hear them. He cut them down quickly and efficiently. The Blade of the Eightfold Lotus was sharp, and there would be no pain in their passing. Mostly, he regretted their fear. Some did in fact try to climb, or even jump, over the carriages. They wanted to die on their backs. So be it.
After a total of fifteen seconds, he had killed thirty five Kor and removed the hands of a thirty sixth.
Jinsen spent two seconds inspecting his blade, and two more inspecting his robes. Free of blood.
He turned around and stepped over to where Sojinrei was kneeling on the stone, attempting to clutch at his bleeding stumps. He would not live much longer. The world fell into focus around Jinsen once more, and he schooled himself calm.
“You monster…” Sojinrei spat, breathing heavily. “You killed them all…”
“Yes.” Jinsen confirmed. “Your mother asked me to.”
“She…” Sojinrei shook his head. “I…”
“I have a fourth question for you, Sojinrei.” Jinsen said, squatting down to look at the dying man. “Are there any Children left?”
After a brief pause, Sojinrei shook his head again, and squeezed his eyes shut. Jinsen had no reason to take Sojinrei at his word, but he also had no reason to disbelieve him. Even if Sojinrei was lying, Jinsen had done as Isawa had asked. Let Sojinrei protect what few people he still could.
“Good.” Jinsen raised his blade. “May you find comfort on the long road.”
The sound of Sojinrei’s head hitting the cobbles echoed through the circle. Decapitations were messy. Jinsen cleaned his blade on Sojinrei’s clothes before sheathing it. Then, he glanced out towards the exit. He had expected more of a crowd to have gathered, considering his talk with Sojinrei had taken almost as long as the battle itself had. But no, there was only one Kor. A young man, staring at Jinsen in horror. No… staring at the corpse at his feet in horror.
“Brother…” The young man whispered softly. Ah. Kensune. Jinsen had not taken the opportunity to meet Isawa’s favored son. It was strange that he and Sojinrei should look so different. Kensune was taller, thinner. With…
Jinsen paused. He had seen those cheek bones before. That brow. The eyes. He… Isawa...
Jinsen looked away. Well. She always had been clever, and he always had been trusting.
“This is war, Nurima Kensune.” Jinsen called. “It was what they wanted. I gave it to them.”
“How could you!” Kensune screamed, a sound of grief and rage. Isawa had said he was soft spoken, but it appeared even the gentlest of Kor had their limits.
“Go and tell all the Clans what the Eightfold Lotus has done.” Jinsen said on the heels of the echo of Kensune’s scream. “Let them remember the wages of war.”
His business concluded, and eager to be elsewhere, Jinsen planeswalked away. If he ever returned here, he resolved, it would be to die.
***
In the end, Jinsen was not even gone a full week, and Kimberley never successfully sheathed her sword without taking shortcuts. She had gotten closer, though, and she felt pretty good about that. What she did not feel good about were the several mortifying conversations that Lord Eijo had prompted between her and Jin as she trained. She had spent that entire first day holed up in her room after practice, completely embarrassed. Lord Eijo had, of course, insisted on the same thing the next day. And the next.
At least Jin was in good humor about it. It was a small comfort.
She was in the garden again when Jinsen returned. At least, she was in the garden again when she heard that Jinsen was back. Apparently, he had gone directly to the shrine of Kymoko and met with Lord Eijo. She heard the news from Jin, who received word from one of the little eyeball spirits that were part of Kymoko.
“The Lotus hopes you are well, and that you have been practicing diligently.” Jin told her, brow furrowed in concentration as he made out the whispers of the tiny spirit. What little Kimberley could hear, she could not understand at all.
“I think we both know that’s been the case.” Kimberley told him quietly, and she watched his face smooth over before he laughed, and grinned along with him.
“I suppose you’re right.” Jin hummed. “Though this means that you will be leaving soon.”
Kimberley felt her stomach drop, and looked away. Yes, well… That was what that meant. Jinsen returned, and soon, they would go. She would be lying to herself if she did not admit the time she spent her had been enjoyable. Jin had been kind, light, and tender. He had mentioned nothing about what they were doing, or what she thought this was, or any sort of talk like that. They had just… been together. She supposed that, from his perspective, that was the wisest course of action. Why waste time sorting things out, when time was limited to begin with?
“Yeah.” Was all she said. Jin touch her chin, prompting her to look at him.
“You’ll visit whenever you want to.” Jin told her, smiling. “You told the Lotus that yourself.” Kimberley looked down, away from his eyes, before squaring her shoulders and grinning impishly.
“I did say that, didn’t I?” She agreed. “Right! I’ll come visit. Soon. When Jinsen has had enough alone time.”
“I’ll be sure to have a room set aside for you.” Jin offered. Kimberley, feeling suddenly bold, quirked an eyebrow and gave him a lidded look.
“Shame. I was hoping to share yours.” She told him, voice low as she leaned forward. Jin’s face immediately turned red and - rendered speechless - he leaned away from her slightly. Totally worth it. Kimberley burst out laughing, and Jin dragged his hand down the side of his face.
“You are…” He began, regaining his composure and glaring at her. The look slid away, though, and he sighed. “Well. You are beautiful.”
Kimberley smiled shyly, and leaned forward to kiss him. He reciprocated the gesture this time, and afterward, they spent the rest of the afternoon drinking tea, tending to the flowers, and enjoying each other’s company. Jin was surprisingly easy to get along with, especially considering their rocky start, and, well, for those few hours, everything was simple and pretty. No katas. No swords. No Lotus.
As was the case whenever she became content, however, she also became terrified. Luckily, she was able to hide this from Jin. She just had to remind herself that she was panicking for no reason, and was, in fact, having a good time.
It was not until almost sunset that Lord Eijo walked into the garden.
Kimberley and Jin sat up from where they were laying on a small patch of grass, watching the sky change colors. Jin nodded to his father, and Kimberley waved, but it seemed as though something heavy was weighing on the older man’s shoulders, and he approached without reaction.
“Kimberley, the Lotus will see you in the dojo. Bring your katana.” Lord Eijo informed her curtly. “Jin, with me.” Jin nodded, squeezed Kimberley’s hand, and promptly left with his father. If they had anything to talk about with one another, they waited until they had left the garden. Kimberley’s heart had started beating quickly as soon as Lord Eijo had entered the garden, however. Something was wrong. Lord Eijo was somber, and Jinsen… Jinsen should have come straight to her, right?
She fled the garden to retrieve her blade. The sooner she got to the bottom of this, the better.
Several scenarios ran through Kimberley’s mind as she walked to the dojo. Jinsen was hurt. Jinsen was angry about her and Jin. Jinsen planned to leave again, but for longer. Something was wrong, though. Something had happened, and now it was time she paid for all the happiness and contentment with the grief and panic she was familiar with. She should have demanded to go with him. She should have-
Kimberley stood in front of the door to the dojo. She took a deep breath, and walked inside.
Jinsen was kneeling on the far side of the room, facing away from her. He did not look hurt. She closed the door behind her, heart in her throat. The silence stretched on.
“Jinsen-” Kimberley began, no longer able to bear it.
“You will not speak again until I say you may.” Jinsen told her suddenly, voice low and without inflection. “You will complete the Fifth Kata now. If you fail, you will no longer be my apprentice.”
His words sent a lance of ice through her stomach, and she just stared at him uncomprehendingly. What… Why? She could not even ask him why! Why had he delivered this ultimatum now, and no earlier? What had happened while he was gone? This was not… This was not fair it…
Kimberley flexed her hands. It was not fair! She had done everything she had been told, everything he had ordered, no matter how strange! And she had watched over him as well, even made him smile, she thought…. She thought he cared. About her. About teaching her. She thought it was what he wanted to do.
Anger, sadness, and fear.
...And yet, here she was, still his apprentice. She had not failed yet. She… she already expected to fail. She was so afraid of what would happen - what Jinsen had just said would happen - that she refused to believe it could ever be any other way.
All she had to do was complete the Fifth Kata. That was… all she had to do. She had done so much more than that, over the seven years she had searched for Jinsen. She had questioned, investigated, traveled, hiked, ran, hidden, and, and… She had sacrificed her entire childhood to her father, and almost all of her adolescence to her search. She had already given so much, she had already done so much.
Kimberley stepped forward and drew her katana, ignoring the tears that streamed down her face. She would do this as well. Failure, she decided, was no longer an option.
Swing.
Rise.
Strike.
Sheathe.
Her katana clicked into the sheath, and settled there. Content.
Despite performing the Fifth Kata perfectly for the first time, Kimberley felt nothing but a hollow sense of victory, and suddenly, an overwhelming peace. She had done as Jinsen had said. She was still going to be his apprentice. Kimberley was no longer crying, but did not bother to dry her face. She held the ending stance of the Fifth Kata for as long as she could. Eventually, Jinsen would stir.
“...You are truly an excellent student.” Jinsen said, finally. Kimberley allowed herself to straighten, and continued to stare at Jinsen’s back. “Go and rest. We leave in the morning.” Kimberley could not help but notice that he had not given her permission to speak. She raised her chin.
“No.” She growled quietly, taking a step forward.
“...No?” Jinsen responded, shifting slightly or the first time, his head turning. “No, what?”
“No, I’m not going to rest.” Kimberley told him stiffly. “No, we are not going to leave in the morning. No, I am not going to leave this room at all!” She had transitioned to shouting halfway through the last sentence, and closed her teeth with an audible clack before speaking again. “You do not get to treat me like that, Jinsen.”
“I treat you as a master would their student.” Jinsen said tonelessly.
“Normally, yes!” Kimberley agreed hotly. “But not this time. That was cruel. You know it was cruel, you know-” She breathed in deeply, calming herself. “You know how I feel about this, Jinsen. About being taught by you. You know how important it is to me.”
“If it is important to you, surely you can set aside your pride-”
Kimberley bared her teeth.
“What Pride!?” She screamed. “What pride do you think a broken girl from the Rasfallen slums has!? What pride do you think that same girl still has after travelling alone for seven years!? I didn’t have any pride until you! Gave! It! To! Me!”
Jinsen said nothing. She knew he did not like it when she shouted, so she swallowed her ire. She was not crying. That was a victory.
“This is the only important thing I’ve ever done.” Kimberley told him, voice mostly even. “Why would you threaten to take it from me?”
“...It’s not what you think it is, Kimberley.” Jinsen whispered. “The Eightfold Lotus is violence, and death. It is not something to be proud of.”
Kimberley folded her arms, and looked away from Jinsen’s still form. What had happened while he was away?
“That’s funny.” She muttered. “To me, the Eightfold Lotus has always been hope.”
“You are wrong.” Jinsen stated flatly. Kimberley scowled.
“I cannot be ‘wrong’ about an opinion, Jinsen.” She shook her head, and took another few steps forward. Was it her imagination, or did Jinsen hunch his shoulders…? “But maybe you’re right. Maybe all the Eightfold Lotus is good for is violence, and death.” Tentatively, she reached out, and put a hand on his shoulder. “But you’re not just the Eightfold Lotus. You’re also Jinsen.” She squeezed, and smiled weakly, hoping she sounded stronger than she felt. “You have excellent hearing, and almost no sense of humor. You like tea, and quiet forests. That doesn’t seem so violent to me.”
For a long time, Jinsen did not respond to her words, and keeping her hand in place became uncomfortable. He shifted as soon as she moved it, feeling overwhelmingly awkward.
“Have a seat, Kimberley.” He offered, gesturing to an empty space beside him. Kimberley knelt down. “Thank you for your kind words.” He began. “I am sorry for trying to chase you off. It was foolish of me to believe such a tactic would work.”
“...You were trying to get rid of me?” Kimberley asked, feeling small.
“No, I was trying to save you.” He murmured. “But I have already done that once. And you reminded me that I am now giving you the skills so that you may do it yourself later.”
Kimberley glanced up at Jinsen. The sun had set several minutes ago, and so there was only the pale moonlight that made his skin seem translucent. She recognized the familiar signs of tears on his face. The front of his tunic was still wet. Kimberley swallowed.
“You thought I would leave?” She tried her best to keep her voice neutral.
“I thought you would stay here, and I would leave.” He replied. “To be with Jin, maybe. Start a different life.” Jinsen shook his head. “Foolish of me. You are stubborn. It never would have worked.”
“...If you really wanted me gone, you could have just not come back.” Kimberley pointed out.
“...I promised I would.” Jinsen told her.
“Oh.”
Silence.
After several minutes of staring at the wall, Jinsen spoke again.
“I understand you met Isawa while you searched for me.” He spoke mildly, but for the first time since Kimberley had known him, she heard something in his voice. Not enough to know what it was, but… something.
“Ah…” Kimberley thought back. That had been… that had been so long ago. “Yes. Your, um… Wife?”
Jinsen hummed. “Not for many decades, now.” He paused. “She passed on. I went to visit her before she did so.” Oh. Kimberley felt bad for shouting at him, now. Well, she had felt bad before but especially now. He had still been a jerk, though.
“I see.” Kimberley whispered. “She um… I remembered asking her if she was sure that you loved her. She said she didn’t know.” She shook her head. She… did not really know what she was saying. Just that she needed to say something. “Did you?”
“...Not how she wanted, no.” Jinsen replied. “And, in the end, it became clear she did not love me how I wanted, either.” That last sentence was so full of emotion that, Kimberley had to turn and stare at Jinsen. His eyes were closed tightly, and he was… grimacing. He looked like he was in pain.
“I’m sorry, Jinsen.” Kimberley offered.
“Until I met you, she was the only one who called me by my name.” Jinsen confessed, more tears leaking through his tightly shut eyes. “I thought she saw me as more than a weapon. She… She did not.”
Kimberley’s throat closed up, and she shifted sideways to put her arms around Jinsen’s waist, and her head against his chest. For once, she was the one doing the comforting. Jinsen draped a long arm over one of her shoulders. Jinsen did not weep, in the practical sense. Occasionally, his eyes would close, and more tears would leak out, but for the most part, his face remained smooth, and his body free of sobs. She was hardly surprised that, like with everything else, he suffered with quiet stillness.
“She was not who I thought she was.” Jinsen breathed after almost an hour. “I think that is why I mourn. It was like she died twice.”
Kimberley just nodded, and retired to bed soon after that.
In the morning, Jinsen greeted her with a placid smile and an invitation to breakfast with Jin and Lord Eijo before they left. They walked together towards the kitchen in silence, but for the first time in what felt like forever, Kimberley was not afraid of what came next.