Joined: Sep 22, 2013 Posts: 5700 Location: Inside my own head
Identity: Human
Since Aaarrrgh seemed to be on board and nobody expressly said anything against the idea, I think it's worth it to hold a re-vote for two stories that did not get outright rejected or accepted from the Anthology back on the mothership.
They are:
Unnamed poem for Tibalt (by cogminded)
On a distant plane called Innistrad
Amidst the turmoil and the strife
There was born a young man Tibalt
And cursed name brings cursed life
In the drownyards of Nephalia
He tried to learn himself a trade
But his mentor found him lacking
Dismissing every corpse he made
Oh Tibalt my boy, my dear friend
Do not listen to what they say
You can find your way in this world
If you’ll just come with me and stay
Rejected by the skaberans
All alone and isolated
He turned his skill to different aims
To hurt the world that he so hated
He started small, testing limits
And no one noticed the rats go
But his studies called for more flesh
And his victims began to grow
Oh Tibalt my boy, my dear friend
Do you realise what you’re doing?
It’s not just vermin anymore
I can see the darkness brewing
Soon even dogs were not enough
His thirst continued to swell
And his torture of the living
Brought creatures who in darkness dwell
Their language was not like his own
But it spoke to him nonetheless
Their chittering give him insights
Into the human body’s stress
Oh Tibalt my boy, my dear friend
You change more and more every day
Everyone’s noticed the difference
And you should hear what people say
Such works cannot go unnoticed
And inquisitors came to call
The door shattered as they entered
And they found him blood drenched, in thrall
But as the devils fled that place
Tibalt cast a spell most fiendish
He felt the pain that he had caused
And the cathars saw him vanish
Oh Tibalt my boy, my dear friend
Can you see what that spell has done?
Your blood is now a devils blood
And devils yearn to see blood run.
Getting Ahead (by Skibo)
The explosion echoed through the graveyard, shards of granite fell like rain. In the dark night, Lew could see the man sized hole in the side of the mausoleum. His partner was already running up to the monument brandishing a crowbar.
Lew grabbed his tools, and rushed for the hole as well. They hadn’t much time. In the distance, dogs barked at the shock of the explosion, and the cold midnight air would only slow people’s investigation of the noise for so long.
Lew stepped into the tomb, and slipped a crowbar under the casket cover. Together, him and his partner pushed the cover from the tomb. Within, a simpler wooden coffin rested, much more fitting for a holy man. Lew took out a hatchet and cut the ropes that bound the box. Lifting the coffin’s lid, they found their prize. The body of Nicolai, the priest of the city of Erdwal.
Lew’s partner started the delicate task of removing the head while Lew stepped out for a moment. The city had come alive with lights and noise. Off near the graveyard gate, he heard a bird call. The signal from his other co-conspirator to wrap up the robbery. Lew could see why. Spilling out of the city and onto the road that led to the cemetery were dozens of people. Each held a torch high. The lookout gave another call.
Lew went back inside just as his partner finished the deed, stuffing the priest’s head into a black bag. “We’re done here,” he said, slinging the bag over his shoulder.
The three conspirators met up on the other side of the cemetery and slipped out into the forest.
~ ~ ~
The three thieves caught their breathes a little ways into the forest. Dimka, Lew’s male partner, still gripped the black bag with a vice. Lew had picked him because of his strength and intelligence. Dimka hailed from a rich trading family in Nephlia, yet he choose to live the life of a thief.
“We have to start moving,” Fanya said “It will be many days of travel before we reach Kessig.” Fanya was a guide and a survivalist. Her expertise was indispensable on the journey. Her keens eyes also made her the best lookout.
“You’re right,” Lew said, “we’ll hike through the night, and make camp in the morning.”
~ ~ ~
Lew didn’t fancy himself a grave robber. Most of his marks were still living socialites, and on occasion a vampire or two. But money is money, and the money was good.
They traveled for many days, until they reached the borderland of Kessig. That’s where the danger began. Stopping at a kill site, Fanya examined a dead deer. “Werewolves,” she concluded “Five or six, a pack”. The beasts were prevalent in Kessig, forming hunting packs that rip and tear through the forest. “We should put distance between us and this deer,” she concluded.
Fanya kept a watchful eye as the trio progressed through the deep forest. Every snapped twig or bird call set them on edge. Fanya carried a cross bow, but such a device would do little to stop a rampaging werewolf. For his part, Dimka held onto the head like it was solid silver.
When the three had reached a river bend, with dusk fast approaching they decided to make camp. Fanya drew from her pack a thin chain. Every tenth link was blessed silver. Enough to discourage a werewolf she hoped. She placed the chain around her bedding.
It started with a growl. Faint at first, at the edge of the clearing. Fanya was the first to wake. Then shuffling around the outskirts, staying out of the firelight. Dimka and Lew woke. Dimka was the first to act, grabbing his blade, he slashed at the darkness.
It was just the opening needed, and a second werewolf leapt from the shadows and clawed into Dimka’s back. Lew reacted instantly, swinging his saber at the werewolf’s exposed flank. Fanya, had loaded her cross bow and took aim at the shadows. Her keen eyes caught a glimpse of fur and lodged an arrow into the first werewolf. “A hunting pair,” she said loading another bolt.
Dimka was feeling light headed as he fought back his werewolf attacker. Blood was pouring from his back. He threw the head down, and ran the werewolf through with his blade. The werewolf, swept up in blood lust, did nothing to avoid the blade, and instead sunk it’s fangs into Dimka’s neck. The two fell where they stood. Dead.
Fanya locked her target onto the other wolf still prowling at a distance. Not as bold as the other, it skirted the camp site. She followed its movement around the camp and when it hesitated, she fired. The shot imbedded itself just above its heart. The beast’s apprehension broke, and it charged at Fanya, tackling her to the ground, and clawing. Lew ran his sword through the thing, ending its miserable life. Lew helped Fanya to her feet. The woman was shaken to her core, bloodied with claw marks, clothing in tatters, but alive.
Lew looked at the werewolves. In death, freed from their curse. They were men, nothing remarkable about them at all.
~ ~ ~
Neither Lew nor Fanya knew whether Dimka belonged to the Avacyn Church, but decided a decent burial was called for. They found a natural depression in the forest floor and placed Dimka and the two men there. After a pray, loose soil was thrown over the three. And a wooden stake hammered in the mark the site.
It was another day before they arrived at Travis’s house. The hermetic alchemist lived in a simple hovel. One that belied his vast wealth. The man was once the most powerful alchemist in Erdwal now spent his time in solitude.
“You have done well,” he said examining the head, “He is just as I remember him.”
Lew and Fanya sat uncomfortably in Travis’s workshop. “As promised, twenty pounds of silver split two ways.” He handed them a sack each.
“What are you going to do with the head?” Fanya asked. “Build a skabb with it?”
“Oh no,” Travis chuckled, “I never want to see this face again.” He placed the head in a jar of embalming fluid. “Nicolai was the one who drove me from Erdwal, forced me into this god forsake place.”
He opened a cupboard, and placed the jar on the shelf, “But I take great joy in known that as long as his head is with me, he’ll never enjoy the blessed sleep.” He closed the cupboard door.
“Now neither of us will get what we want. “
Now the original votes were 3NAI for the poem and 1Y/1N for Skibo's story; but for the sake of not having to trudge through the mothership again, and to allow those who may have voted the first time to either reaffirm their choice or change their mind, I'll start it fresh.
Aaarrrgh already threw in his two cents, so I'll start the tally with his post:
Aaarrrgh wrote:
Well, I'll just throw my voice in right here, if that's okay.
I felt the Tibalt poem didn't flow properly, and I agree with Barinellos' canon concerns, so I'd vote Nay on that. [Poem for Tibalt] (Cogminded) Y N 1 NAI
I liked all of the others, so I'll give my official vote for Getting Ahead:
Getting ahead (Skibo) Y 1 N NAI
I find it interesting that the alchemist said that the arrangement was for the payment to be split in two, as though they hadn't expected all three of the graverobbers to make it back...
As a final note, I apologize if doing this was either unnecessary or unwanted, but I find that -at least around here- I need to power on ahead to get anything done.
I have no problem with re-voting. It doesn't hurt anything, and it gives me a reason to look at some of these I have more or less forgotten about. After re-reading these, my original opinion remains the same. Neither one blew me away by any stretch. The poem's irregular meter and generally weak rhymes make it hard for me to really get into, but if the meter were tightened up (if Cogminded is still around anywhere) I'd say yes, but for me it's "Not As Is." As for Getting Ahead, it's fine, just nothing special, to me. But because I can't think of a good reason to say no, I'll say yes.
Joined: Sep 22, 2013 Posts: 5700 Location: Inside my own head
Identity: Human
I'm voting on just the poem for the moment; I'll come back and read the story some time during the week.
Honestly, I don't think it's all that bad. There's nothing that stands out either, though. To me it's... I want to say mediocre, but not meaning so in a negative way -- just that it's middle-of-the-ground kind of quality. I may be a little cynical, but I think that we should be aiming for higher quality. I'm going to say Nay.
At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost. Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind. To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"
As a reminder, this was Seasons of Dusk as we last saw it...
Θ Harvest Moon Θ 1) Childhood's End [D] 2) *Untitled (Skibo Poem) [H] 3) Bell, Book, and Candle [u] 4) Hinterland Within [W] 5) The Cellar Door [S] 6) *Nephalia Rains [N][G] 7) To Purge the Wicked [W][G] 8) Blessed Be My Guilt [G] 9) Creatures of the Night [V] 10) Dear and Decorations [u] 11) Through Darkness [G][D] 12) *Blasphemous Act [D] 13) Requiem For An Angel [N]
∩ Hunter's Moon ∩ 1) Butcher's Cleaver [H] 2) Fury Without [W] 3) Danse Macabre [u][S] 4) *Thirteen [N?] 5) Crucible [H] 6) Allo's Fortnight [W][H] 7) Ill Met By Moonlight [D] 8) Hollow [G] 9) Night Watch [u] 10) *The Maid and the Gentelman [V] 11) Consummare [D] 12) Dear Namior [W] 13) Through the Eyes of the Specter of Might-Have-Been [H][u]
☼ New Moon ☼ 1) Therapy [W][S] 2) *Cathar's Prayer [N] 3) Occurance at a Moorland Manor [G][D] 4) The Unlife and Times of Gorin Halvarsson [u] 5) (Untitled) by Fakeartist [V] 6) Justice [W] 7) *Rising Moon [N] 8) Un Bon Vein Rouge [V] 9) (Something untitled) by Shamsiel [G] 10) Falkenrath's Seat [V] 11)The Banker and the Geist [G] 12) *Parabel of the Stars [N] 13) The Fateful Hour [H][u][S]
But Un Bon Vein Rouge is out. It looks like Getting Ahead will probably pass and enter the Anthology, but it can't just take the place of Un Bon Vein. I suggest the following Alterations
Un Bon Vein Rouge is out. Justice switches into its vacated spot at New Moon 8 Blessed Be My Guilt moves into New Moon 6 Getting Ahead moves into the vacated position at Harvest Moon 8
We also need to get someone to ghost edit Hinterland Within. I think it's worth saving, but no one's got a handle on Tequila to revise it.
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Joined: Sep 22, 2013 Posts: 5700 Location: Inside my own head
Identity: Human
I thank you for that, Tevish, but I meant to make a thread concerning the ordering/current status of the Anthology today. I'm running through what we've got, but I need to double-check how many we have that were all in. Thread up.
Okay, I kind of liked Getting Ahead. *groan* and I just realized what a bad joke the title is.
Anyway, some typos: Him and his partner > ? Grammatical? Nephlia > Nephalia Keens eyes > keen eyes Fanya, > subtract the comma Fanya locked her target onto the other wolf > ? Grammatical? God forsake place > god forsaken OR Avacyn forsaken I take great joy in know that > I take great joy in knowing that
So, I say Yea, although I it feels like a small part of a series of interlinked stories that I know won't be done.
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