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PostPosted: Mon Sep 01, 2014 10:03 pm 
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Look, a plausible-looking story!

Quote:
On the Djinn-ruled elemental plane Wildfire a Djinn is pondering the importance of a Human Minion when Lukas Harran comes into conflict with the Djinn. As a result, the Djinn ascends in a moment of giddy joy and stumbles into Zent! Now [Name], the Prancing Djinn needs to learn more about Dominia and improve zir red magic.



Anyway, I had once made a list of all the possible types of magical practice I could think of and I don't know if I kept it...

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 2:58 pm 
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You know, if we created the separate generator that Barinellos is proposing (and a Plane generator?) I think it would be possible to hook that generator up to THIS generator, so that we can call stuff from THAT generator in THIS generator...

Just a thought.

I haven't tried that, though, obviously, so I have no idea what bugs might emerge. That said, hooking things up that way miiight take care of some of the bugs we've seen previously. I really have no idea what will happen.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 8:16 pm 
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Quote:
Clade planeswalks to Ravnica. There, he tears down civilization, leaving only a Moonfolk alive.

Wow. That's some hardcore mass murder you've got going on there, Clade.

Quote:
Aamir must grudgingly accept the help of a newly ascended Planeswalker: a Zombie Dragon Pirate!

:ookay:

Quote:
Alessa Rehn arrives on Ikass, in the possession of the artifact known as The Coin of Eirene. There, she trades information with Raiker Venn , hoping to learn more about The Coin of Eirene.

Huh. Entirely plausible and potentially interesting!

Quote:
Clade arrives unexpectedly on a distant plane. There, he tears down civilization, leaving only a Horror Survivor alive.

Horrified, anyway.

Quote:
The Black Grail has resurfaced from the depths of history, and now Beryl, the Heart-Scarred planeswalks to Aliavelli in search of it. But Beryl, the Heart-Scarred gets more than she bargained for when she crosses the path of Maral, Celestial Wright .

Ah-ha! The plot thickens! Beryl certainly is popular lately...

Quote:
After an unfortunate incident, Illarion Vale is suffering from haunting by ghostly phantoms. Now, he has to travel to Shadowmoor in search of Aamir in the desperate hope that he can help.

"The faces of those he's wronged float up at him..."

Quote:
Aloise Hartley attempts to explain how much trouble she is in to Raef, but the arrival of Illarion Vale complicates matters."

"Yeah, and then he blew up this whole plane! And I was like...oh...hi, Illarion..."

Quote:
While quietly pondering the meaning of life, The Duchess was attacked by The Shifter. Now, The Duchess is too weak to ‘walk.

:laugh:


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 8:49 pm 
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Quote:
Lukas Harran starts a band with Raiker Venn, Larasa Farleth, and Morgan of Voor. Their first gig is tonight, on Iun Ilana, but pop idol Lourima Viiran schemes to turn the battle of the bands... into a literal battle!!

One of these things is not like the other ones.

Quote:
While drinking at the Screaming Rogue tavern on Adrisar, Clade was attacked by Aloise Hartley. Now, Clade just wants to get drunk.

He wanted to do that before.

Quote:
Cara Holis arrives unexpectedly on the rogue plane Shandalar. There she interrupts a conspiracy between Gruff and A Timmerian fiend . After the experience, she is left suffering from having eaten goblin soup!

Gruff's cooking is no better than that of your average goblin

Quote:
Due to a slight miscalculation, Syl of the Dual-Walkers was attacked by a Skeleton Noggle Carrier. Now, Syl of the Dual-Walkers suffers from a stab wound.

Apparently, that fight did not go Syl's way

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I have a blog. I review anime, and sometimes related media, with an analytical focus.

I'm a (self) published author now! You can find my books on Amazon in Paperback or ebook!
The Accursed, a standalone young adult fantasy adventure.
Witch Hunters, book one of a young adult Scifi-fantasy trilogy.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 02, 2014 11:23 pm 
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Quote:
Raiker Venn begins traveling with The Shifter. But when The Shifter attempts to win the heart of Jade, Raiker Venn is forced to planeswalk to Luvion, home of Celestine Reef.

I'm almost certain Shifter did this just to **** with Raiker.
Quote:
Yesterday, Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands was attacked by a Sphinx. Now, Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands suffers from an erratic mutation and needs serious help.
It turns out Rishima came from a very dysfunctional family. Who'da thunk it?
Quote:
Beryl, the Heart-Scarred explores Jakkard, where she becomes insanely jealous of Aloise Hartley. Aloise Hartley tries to calm Beryl, the Heart-Scarred down, which proves difficult as Aloise Hartley attempts to apprehend and bring to justice Chardis of the Dual-Walkers .
If you're going to pay attention to a pyromancer, why him!? WHY NOT ME?!

HAHA... I made myself feel mildly bad about that.
Quote:
Yesterday, Larasa Farleth was attacked by a Skeleton Zombie Pegasus Wizard. Now, Larasa Farleth is too weak to ‘walk.

...
...... really?
Quote:
The unthinkable has occurred on a strange distortion in the Blind Eternities--a phenomenon known as Reality Shaping--outside of Keter, which has caused a phenomenon known as a Morphic Tide. Zhiran is trapped there, but he isn't the only one caught in the cataclysm. Now Zhiran apparently interrupts a romantic meeting between Denner Fabellian and Alessa Rehn but is secretly being manipulated by Vasilias, Lord of Ariva , but receives the artifact known as The Darkmantle from Illarion Vale .
SWEET GOD. WHAT IS GOING ON!?
Quote:
The paths of fate have converged and Sri Hara interrupts a conspiracy between Beryl, the Heart-Scarred and Aloise Hartley, on behalf of Fisco Vane, the Shark because of the machinations of Raef.
there are JUST enough canon pieces in there that it makes me wonder how the hell they fit together....
Quote:
Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands arrives on Ihn Gallad, in the possession of the artifact known as The Last of All. Mad with power, she uses The Last of All to terrible effect!
That'll do it...
Quote:
Cara Holis hides out on Grixis, on the plane Alara .
Who told you!? I mean... no... never. :incognito:
Quote:
The paths of fate have converged and Vasilias, Lord of Ariva attempts to win the heart of Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands because Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands is searching for An Æther Vent.
I don't even know what to say about this.
Quote:
Sri Hara planeswalks to Janhapurh. There, he interrupts a romantic meeting between Raiker Venn and An insidious Asura and Ellia the Endbringer .
Ah! Home at last... what the hell is going on here!?

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Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 3:26 am 
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I present to you Some Things Never Change. It has an alternate title of UTTER **** DON'T READ THIS SERIOUSLY I TOTALLY BUTCHERED THE PLANE AND THE CHARACTERS CARA IS NOT LIKE THIS, LIA IS NOT LIKE THIS AND HOLY HELL SEGOVIA IS NOT LIKE THIS! **** THE PLOT IS ALSO TERRIBLE BECAUSE IT COMES FROM THE RANDOM PLOT GENERATOR AND SERIOUSLY I CANT WRITE AT ALL EVER

Spoiler


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 9:23 am 
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Quote:
I present to you Some Things Never Change. It has an alternate title of UTTER **** DON'T READ THIS SERIOUSLY I TOTALLY BUTCHERED THE PLANE AND THE CHARACTERS CARA IS NOT LIKE THIS, LIA IS NOT LIKE THIS AND HOLY HELL SEGOVIA IS NOT LIKE THIS! **** THE PLOT IS ALSO TERRIBLE BECAUSE IT COMES FROM THE RANDOM PLOT GENERATOR AND SERIOUSLY I CANT WRITE AT ALL EVER


While I commend your exuberant approach to humility, I would like to point out that if you preface everything you write with "this is trash", you're going to find that people will be less inclined to read it.

Because you, as the author, have just asserted that the piece in question is garbage.

Now, I'm not saying this piece IS garbage - I haven't even read it yet! - only that if you discredit your work before it has even been presented... Well, I don't see much of a reason to read something that not even the author thinks is worth reading.

I know it takes a lot of courage to post your writing on the internet, and that depreciation of that writing beforehand may "soften the blow", but it takes MORE courage to post your writing on the internet AND assert that it is worth reading! This is something I encourage you to do, as the above behavior is off-putting at best, and irritating at worst.

Now, for the mini-fic itself!

Spoiler


Thanks for posting, B_E!

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 9:54 am 
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What Ruwin said!

Also, in addition to all that, while the nods to the fourth wall wouldn't work too well in more serious M:EM fiction, I chuckled at them. :)


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 9:58 am 
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B_E, I'll just echo Ruwin's sentiments. It's *super normal* to be anxious about what you write. I am anxious about literally everything I post. Just picture me curled into a fetal ball with a box of Kleenex in one hand and a bottle of Johnnie Walker in the other, and you'll get the idea of what I mean.

But, instead of talking down your own work -- which, like Ruwin said, can discourage people from reading it -- channel that nervous energy into a request for feedback.

Instead of saying: "I'm worried this is bad, don't read it!"

Say: "I would really appreciate suggestions for how I might improve this piece."

Now you're drawing people in, and you're inviting them to help you get better. And people around these parts can offer very good, very constructive feedback. I know it helps me all the time, and it's a way to turn a negative -- creative anxiety -- into a positive -- a chance to grow and develop.

Thanks for posting, B_E!

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 10:21 am 
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Of course, it's also problematic if you assert that everything you write is quite literally the best thing every written up to that point in history.

Besides, that's my thing... :shifty:


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 10:31 am 
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Of course, it's also problematic if you assert that everything you write is quite literally the best thing every written up to that point in history.

Technically, that's only problematic if it isn't true.

No pressure, Raven. ;)

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 11:27 am 
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Quote:
Yesterday, Mari Gwynn was attacked by a Weird Barbarian. Now, Mari Gwynn is trying to figure out how it happened.
A Barbarian Weird, or just a weird Barbarian?

Quote:
While drinking at the Dark Jellyfish tavern on Bolas's Meditation Plane, Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands was attacked by Lourima Viiran. Now, Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands is seeking revenge.
Now there's a strange place for a tavern.

Quote:
Helkavin is under attack! Mari Gwynn must gather allies such as a demon of the Xordikrast and Illarion Vale before it's too late, but she is hampered when she suffers from mana backlash at the hands of a demon of the Xordikrast.
Yeah, well maybe you should have picked better allies Mari.

Quote:
Lia Xin begins traveling with Aria. Together, they becomes infatuated and begins stalking Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands
Really, really bad choice guys.

Quote:
In a very special musical episode, A Timmerian fiend planeswalks to The Celestial Realm. There, it comes into conflict with a planar native... In song!
:ookay:

Quote:
Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands joins forces with a newly ascended Planeswalker: a Plant Bear Survivor!
Raawr!

Quote:
The Duchess attempts to explain poetry to Syl of the Dual-Walkers, but Syl of the Dual-Walkers just won't listen.
I picture these two in a posh sitting room somewhere, sipping expensive teas.

Quote:
It's happy hour at the Laughing Snake tavern on Tarkir, and Raiker Venn and Kahr-ret-Taris are carousing. Suddenly a planar native arrives in search of heroes to brave the evil lair of Rishima, Queen of the Black Sands . Who will rise to the challenge? And can Raiker Venn be trusted?
Not that I want to change it, but it is funny when something impossible like this happens (unless Rishima had set up a lair on Tarkir).

Quote:
Aamir arrives on Jakkard, in the possession of the artifact known as a gilded lotus. Aamir threatens to unleash the artifact's power upon the world!
That's... really not very scary. Especially compared to the other artifacts.

Quote:
Jade attempts to explain how to bathe a Zombie Cleric to Huinn, Last of the Darkwings, but it goes poorly.
Why would anyone want to bathe a Zombie Cleric?!

Quote:
Illarion Vale arrives on Siraus, in the possession of the artifact known as An Æther Vent. Illarion Vale threatens to unleash the artifact's power upon the world!
Not this again!

Quote:
Renn Winmoore interrupts a romantic meeting between Alessa Rehn and a newly ascended Planeswalker: a Nymph Praetor!
This just in: an unnamed and previously really weak Tanglewalker has suddenly unseated Vorinclex!

Quote:
A Timmerian fiend begins travelling with Maral, Celestial Wright. Can they stick together despite their differences?
Hopefully Maral figures this out before she lets slip the location of her awesome vault of awesome artifacts.

Quote:
In a very special musical episode, Kahr-ret-Taris planeswalks to a strange distortion in the Blind Eternities--a phenomenon known as Interplanar Tunnel--outside of Gentev. There, he buys flowers for Renn Winmoore ... In song!


Quote:
The paths of fate have converged and The Eightfold Lotus seemingly seemingly is deceived by Aria, but secretly is working to oppose Ellia the Endbringer, but secretly is working to oppose Ygraine of Segovia because Ygraine of Segovia is searching for The Soulstone.


Quote:
Agmund is investigating the theft of a fortune in gold on Keter and his suspects include Lia Xin, Syl of the Dual-Walkers, Ygraine of Segovia, and an Eternal Guard member. To his surprise, all the facts point to... Ygraine of Segovia!
But... how could she even carry it?

Quote:
It's happy hour at the Playing Octopus tavern on Serra's Realm, and Daneera and Lia Xin are carousing. Suddenly a planar native arrives in search of heroes to slay a terrible Minotaur Assembly-Worker. Who will rise to the challenge? And can Daneera be trusted?
The sign outside the Playing Octopus shows an octopus sitting on a cloud and playing a fiddle, a banjo, and accordian, and a piano all at the same time.

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If something isn't extremely explicit and blatant then I wasn't thinking it. I'm incapable of sublety and don't know how to imply things. I never knowingly "imply" anything, ever.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 12:26 pm 
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Quote:
Jade attempts to explain how to bathe a Zombie Cleric to Huinn, Last of the Darkwings, but it goes poorly.

Why would anyone want to bathe a Zombie Cleric?!

Some mysteries are better left unsolved?

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 2:17 pm 
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Quote:
The Duchess attempts to explain poetry to Syl of the Dual-Walkers, but Syl of the Dual-Walkers just won't listen.
I picture these two in a posh sitting room somewhere, sipping expensive teas.
I know the Duchess is a tea snob, but I dunno if Syl would be.
Quote:
Quote:
Aamir arrives on Jakkard, in the possession of the artifact known as a gilded lotus. Aamir threatens to unleash the artifact's power upon the world!
That's... really not very scary. Especially compared to the other artifacts.
Aamir is just too nice a guy to be an effective villain I guess....
Quote:
Quote:
It's happy hour at the Playing Octopus tavern on Serra's Realm, and Daneera and Lia Xin are carousing. Suddenly a planar native arrives in search of heroes to slay a terrible Minotaur Assembly-Worker. Who will rise to the challenge? And can Daneera be trusted?
The sign outside the Playing Octopus shows an octopus sitting on a cloud and playing a fiddle, a banjo, and accordian, and a piano all at the same time.
[/quote] A minotaur assembly worker? he works in a factory, isn't that punishment enough?

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At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost.
Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 03, 2014 2:36 pm 
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Quote:
Jade attempts to explain how to bathe a Zombie Cleric to Huinn, Last of the Darkwings, but it goes poorly.

Why would anyone want to bathe a Zombie Cleric?!

Some mysteries are better left unsolved?

This whole exchange reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from Fraggle Rock (a great show, if you've never seen it.)

Tinkerer (into the phone): "I'm trying to figure out how to sew a button on an egg." ... "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, 'WHY?'! I HAVEN'T EVEN FIGURED OUT HOW YET!"


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 11:54 am 
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Quote:
Zhiran begins searching for a Phyrexian heartstone. But things are rarely simple and matters take a serious turn when Aloise Hartley appears too. Now Zhiran has a difficult choice to make.

"So, I can either continue my search for this artifact which may lead me to a cure for the Phyrexia problem, or I can spend an afternoon chatting with this enchanting young lady. Hmm..."

Quote:
The Last of All has resurfaced from the depths of history, and now Raiker Venn planeswalks to Ergamon, home of Truga Jungle in search of it.

Raiker probably would consider that thing a great keepsake.

Quote:
Raiker Venn has decided to write a new poem about Aria. Poor Aria.

Now you're just picking on people, Raiker.

Quote:
It's a high stakes game of cards on Ikass between Syl of the Dual-Walkers , Sri Hara, and an ancient Hellion. But it is the last hand between Syl of the Dual-Walkers and Sri Hara, and there might be more on the line than anyone suspects!

Loser has to clean up the mess created by the ancient Hellion...

Quote:
Lia Xin begins traveling with Alessa Rehn.

This is a potentially interesting duo.

Quote:
Sri Hara planeswalks to Zent, where he becomes insanely jealous of Denner Fabellian. Denner Fabellian tries to calm Sri Hara down, which proves difficult as Denner Fabellian joins forces with Alessa Rehn .

"You remember everything? It's not fair..." (sad elephant face)

Quote:
The Chaos Ring has resurfaced from the depths of history, and now Chardis of the Dual-Walkers planeswalks to Innistrad in search of it. Can he get to it before Lourima Viiran ?

I don't think either of those options are good. But, if Avacyn's power is directly proportional to the danger Humans on Innistrad are in, she'd probably about to get a serious boost...

Quote:
Denner Fabellian begins traveling with The Eightfold Lotus. But they soon come to blows! Who will survive?

Well, it was nice knowing you, Denner...

Quote:
While investigating mysterious ruins, Zhiran was attacked by Clade. Now, Zhiran is trying to figure out how it happened.

Actually a sort of interesting fight there.

Quote:
Beryl, the Heart-Scarred begins searching for the absolute best cheeseburger in the multiverse.

:D


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 12:16 pm 
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Quote:
Beryl, the Heart-Scarred begins searching for the absolute best cheeseburger in the multiverse.

:D

"What's that?" A confused look formed on Beryl's face as she stared at the mysterious object in Aloise's hands.

"It's a cheeseburger, silly!" Aloise said. "Try it!"

Beryl accepted the strange, patty-like device which the blonde had placed between two halves of a toasted roll and topped with cheese. She took a deep breath, and bit into the construction.

After chewing in silence for several seconds, a single tear rolled down her cheek.

"Why didn't anyone ever tell me about cheeseburgers?" she asked through a mouthful of the most magical food she had ever tasted.

"Let's make up for lost time," Aloise said with a smile. "Come on, we're going on a Quest for the Absolute Best Cheeseburger in the Multiverse!"

* * *

Quest for the Absolute Best Cheeseburger in the Multiverse
Enchantment [Medium-Rare]


At the end of your turn, if you talked about food during that turn, place a quest counter on ~.

As long as there are five or more quest counters on ~, you may sacrifice it. If you do, target opponent must either buy you a cheeseburger (from the restaurant of your choice, with your choice of fixings and sides) or forfeit the game.

Super-size me!

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 1:39 pm 
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Quote:
Beryl, the Heart-Scarred begins searching for the absolute best cheeseburger in the multiverse.

:D

"What's that?" A confused look formed on Beryl's face as she stared at the mysterious object in Aloise's hands.

"It's a cheeseburger, silly!" Aloise said. "Try it!"

Beryl accepted the strange, patty-like device which the blonde had placed between two halves of a toasted roll and topped with cheese. She took a deep breath, and bit into the construction.

After chewing in silence for several seconds, a single tear rolled down her cheek.

"Why didn't anyone ever tell me about cheeseburgers?" she asked through a mouthful of the most magical food she had ever tasted.

"Let's make up for lost time," Aloise said with a smile. "Come on, we're going on a Quest for the Absolute Best Cheeseburger in the Multiverse!"

* * *

Quest for the Absolute Best Cheeseburger in the Multiverse
Enchantment [Medium-Rare]


At the end of your turn, if you talked about food during that turn, place a quest counter on ~.

As long as there are five or more quest counters on ~, you may sacrifice it. If you do, target opponent must either buy you a cheeseburger (from the restaurant of your choice, with your choice of fixings and sides) or forfeit the game.

Super-size me!

Medium Rare... :thumbsup:


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 7:08 pm 
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Quote:
Zhiran begins traveling with Daneera. But they soon come to blows! Who will survive?

If Daneera didn't get him in the first shot, she's not getting him. And let's face it, she didn't get him in the first shot.

Quote:
It's happy hour at the Green Cockatrice tavern on Dark Rabiah, and The Eightfold Lotus , A warlord, and Raef are carousing. Suddenly Rishima arrives in search of heroes to slay a terrible Slug. Who will rise to the challenge? And can A warlord be trusted?

No, in general, a warlord cannot be trusted, but I doubt that's your biggest worry.

Quote:
An Æther Vent has resurfaced from the depths of history, and now Raleris, the Lorekeeper planeswalks to Helkavin in search of it. Can he get to it before Lourima Viiran ?

Get those Beebles ready, Raleris. We're all counting on you...

Quote:
Alessa Rehn attempts to explain pacifism to The Duchess, but The Duchess just won't listen.

Poor Alessa...

Quote:
Yesterday, Raleris, the Lorekeeper was attacked by a Wolverine Rogue. Now, Raleris, the Lorekeeper just wants to get drunk.

*snikt* *snikt*


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PostPosted: Thu Sep 04, 2014 7:23 pm 
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Quote:
Alessa Rehn attempts to explain pacifism to The Duchess, but The Duchess just won't listen.

Poor Alessa...
I am reminded of the scene from the 1989 Batman where the Joker puts on glasses...
Quote:
Quote:
Yesterday, Raleris, the Lorekeeper was attacked by a Wolverine Rogue. Now, Raleris, the Lorekeeper just wants to get drunk.

*snikt* *snikt*
It's the best at what it does, and what it does isn't very nice.

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At twilight's end, the shadow's crossed / a new world birthed, the elder lost.
Yet on the morn we wake to find / that mem'ry left so far behind.
To deafened ears we ask, unseen / "Which is life and which the dream?"


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