"How they caught her trail, she could not guess, and many times she considered leaving the great city rather than continuing to attempt to evade their patrols."
Those last few words clunk into each other a bit; I would rephrase it to "rather than continue to attempt evading"
"what she want, and what she felt she want were for at once at odds, "
Unless I'm misreading something, both of those "want" should be "wanted".
"He reached into a mass of boards that seemed to lean against the wall and pulled, and instead of the boards falling away they, and some of the wall swung out."
The way that last part is constructed is a little wonky. The easiest way to fix it is to add another comma after the second "wall".
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This one I liked a lot better than Charity. I think I gravitate toward dark endings, despite my general abhorrence of violence and inability of dealing with blood. I may just like fantasy dark in general, since that was a big selling point of Deadman Wonderland for me, and the ending of both Code Geass and Death Note made me feel like those series had been justified.
It was much easier for me to get into Lourima's head for this one, though I'm not sure I can fully get behind her hormonal impulses. Seeing the deeply interconnected nature of Charity and Kindness, and expecting the same with Kinship, I'll still withhold my vote until I've finished all three. Suffice to say I'm leaning much further toward Yea on this one.
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