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Stare Down the Basilisk
Poll ended at Sun Jun 22, 2014 10:05 pm
Safe as houses (Yea) 80%  80%  [ 4 ]
Over my dead body (Nay) 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Now hold up there (Not As Is) 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
None of my business (Abstain) 20%  20%  [ 1 ]
Total votes : 5
Total voters : 5
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PostPosted: Wed Jun 11, 2014 11:53 am 
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Stare Down the Basilisk
by OrcishLibrarian


I. A Train to Catch


II. The Encore

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Last edited by OrcishLibrarian on Sat Jun 14, 2014 10:05 pm, edited 3 times in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 11, 2014 11:54 am 
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III. The Devil You Know


IV. Settling Accounts

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 11, 2014 6:00 pm 
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Have there been any changes since it was first posted? Have any lines been changed or anything?

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 11, 2014 9:51 pm 
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Have there been any changes since it was first posted? Have any lines been changed or anything?


Funny you should ask!

- About 6 or 7 typo fixes.
- Some small changes to word choice (in response to feedback); essentially, a substitution here or there.
- Added a quick reference to Tishia near the end of Chapter 4.
- Restructured the Dazie/Jackie conversational flashback when Jackie is meeting with Presto in Chapter 1, to try to make the time jump clearer/less jarring.

They're all fairly minor. I don't remember the specifics for the typos and such off the top of my head, but I'd be happy to answer any questions if they come up.

EDIT - Also, I added all the paragraph tags, because there's no reason you ought to have to do that.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 11, 2014 10:02 pm 
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I just thought if nothing had changed I could vote right away, and if a few minor things had, then I could examine just those points and not have to re-read the whole thing.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 11, 2014 10:04 pm 
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Yeah, the substantive (i.e. non-single-word) changes are just the last two items, and I'd say they amount to less than fifteen lines of text. So anyone who just wants to re-read the altered portions should be able to do so very quickly.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 12:47 pm 
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Yeah, this deserves to be in the archives, and that's really all there is to say on the matter.

:cool:

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 8:11 pm 
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This gets an enthusiastic yes from me :D


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2014 3:23 pm 
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Yup, a quick re-read suggests nothing here to keep me from voting "Yea." Just as good today as the day it was written.


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2014 3:31 pm 
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You guys are going to give me a serious case of the Sally Fields. Thanks to all.

@ Raven - I obviously don't expect you to remember precisely how the prior version went, but I'm wondering if you found the Dazie/Jackie aside when she's meeting with Presto any easier to parse this time around?

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2014 3:47 pm 
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You guys are going to give me a serious case of the Sally Fields. Thanks to all.

@ Raven - I obviously don't expect you to remember precisely how the prior version went, but I'm wondering if you found the Dazie/Jackie aside when she's meeting with Presto any easier to parse this time around?

Oh, sorry. Should have said something. Yes, it's a lot less jarring now. I'm still not completely convinced Dazie's dialog needs to be shown, but I didn't find it in any way distracting this time around, so I would say this way is certainly better.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 21, 2014 7:56 am 
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I'm glad it was at least partly improved. I think you're correct that the dialog snippet doesn't need to be there, but, when I took it out, I missed it. So I just slimmed it down and tried to clarify the transitions in and out, which I think at least smoothed down some of the rougher edges.

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