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 Post subject: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 7:06 pm 
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This was a one-off story I wrote a while back based off the card Pariah. I'm really happy with how this turned out, although I'm not entirely sure this belongs in the archives. Someone might be able to convince me it does, but either way, I do think I want it here in NGA. So, please enjoy a personal favorite of mine from within my personal collection.

Pariah


Last edited by RavenoftheBlack on Thu Jun 12, 2014 1:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 8:24 pm 
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Aaaah I forgot about this story.

This is a good story. A very good story. I know I would vote on it if you put it up for a vote. In a heartbeat. I think Luna might be right about this being your best--it's just a really solid piece of work.


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 8:40 pm 
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Aaaah I forgot about this story.

This is a good story. A very good story. I know I would vote on it if you put it up for a vote. In a heartbeat. I think Luna might be right about this being your best--it's just a really solid piece of work.

Thanks!

I'm really fond of this story. I think the atmosphere it obtains is pretty impactful.


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 9:01 pm 
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I think Luna might be right about this being your best--it's just a really solid piece of work.

Just a note: I don't believe I've ever read this and I certainly didn't mention it anytime recently. I've stuck it on my to-do list because, hey, it's Raven we're talking about here, but I'm putting it on the bottom of the list to work on some of the earlier stuff that was put up in this subforum. I'll visit it sometime.

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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 9:05 pm 
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Yeah, I think it was actually me that said that, embarrassingly enough. And no hurry on reading it. I just put it up here for people to enjoy.


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 9:27 pm 
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This is wonderful. One tiny typo first, then I'll get on with my main business of gushing about how much I like this.

Quote:
The soldiers behind the envoy were aching for action, and the village[R]s knew they did not stand a chance against even a fraction of this massive army, but still the envoy and Mznabi spoke on, first one and then the other.


Honestly - and, to be absolutely clear, I mean this as a compliment - this almost reads like a timeworn piece of literature. There is something of a Biblical parable to it, or a classic fable, or even a well-travelled children's story. It doesn't feel constructed; it feels found.

I've commented before on how well I think you write endings, and this is one of those cases. I started out thinking this was going to be something along the lines of "The Lottery," but over the course of the story it became clear that we were headed in a slightly different direction. And, when I got to the ending, it hit like a ton of bricks. And, as is often the case with your stories, the reader gets paid off in a way which is surprising but - critically! - also fair. I can look back and see all the pieces which set up the conclusion. It's not a "twist" - it's something that feels correct when it arrives. It doesn't make you feel tricked; it makes you feel like you should have seen it coming, like it couldn't possibly have concluded any other way.

I won't say this is your best piece, (a) because I haven't read all of you stuff yet, and (b) because I never like labelling something as "best" because I always like to think that our best piece is one which we still haven't written yet. But I will gladly call this wonderful.

As to whether or not it has a place in the Archive, I think the question is a simple one in the end: Am I happier with an Archive which includes this, or one which doesn't? It's not a tough question to answer.

And, frankly, the idea which is currently buzzing around inside my head is that I would love to see a collection of single-card stories. We have a bunch of them already, and I think it wouldn't take too much work to put a really solid anthology together. It would even have a nice kind of symmetry with the Tapestries anthology, which was essentially just that - a bunch of stories more or less inspired by individual cards.

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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 9:49 pm 
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The same thought occurred to me, OL. I mean, hell, a number of the stories for both our existing anthologies were single card stories, and a lot of the other stand alone pieces are like that as well.

Yeah, I think there's potential there.


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 10:08 pm 
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I've commented before on how well I think you write endings, and this is one of those cases. I started out thinking this was going to be something along the lines of "The Lottery," but over the course of the story it became clear that we were headed in a slightly different direction. And, when I got to the ending, it hit like a ton of bricks. And, as is often the case with your stories, the reader gets paid off in a way which is surprising but - critically! - also fair. I can look back and see all the pieces which set up the conclusion. It's not a "twist" - it's something that feels correct when it arrives. It doesn't make you feel tricked; it makes you feel like you should have seen it coming, like it couldn't possibly have concluded any other way.

I'm pleased to see this reaction. I believe I have stated this before, but it bears repeating. I believe that good stories, or rather good twists, are unexpected, but logical. Too many times I have seen new writers do things in their stories which are entirely unexpected, but only because they came out of nowhere and had nothing to do with the rest of the story. I can't say I always succeed in this little mantra of mine, but I try.

As to whether or not it has a place in the Archive, I think the question is a simple one in the end: Am I happier with an Archive which includes this, or one which doesn't? It's not a tough question to answer.

I see what you did there. Well played.

And, frankly, the idea which is currently buzzing around inside my head is that I would love to see a collection of single-card stories. We have a bunch of them already, and I think it wouldn't take too much work to put a really solid anthology together. It would even have a nice kind of symmetry with the Tapestries anthology, which was essentially just that - a bunch of stories more or less inspired by individual cards.

I like this idea, and let's face it, we already have a ton of poems to fill in the blanks, since this is essentially what I do over in Raven's Rhymes.


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Sun May 18, 2014 10:14 pm 
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The same thought occurred to me, OL. I mean, hell, a number of the stories for both our existing anthologies were single card stories, and a lot of the other stand alone pieces are like that as well.

Yeah, I think there's potential there.


I'd say that great minds think alike, but I wouldn't want to be presumptuous. So I will just say that between one and two great minds (inclusive) think/thinks alike.

I specifically like the idea that it would provide a place for these sorts of stories without any expectation that they have to somehow fit in with the larger jigsaw puzzle. The work which is going on now to draw together some of the various M:EM strands is super exciting; this could almost be the other side of that coin - an explicit way to leave space for really wonderful work which can just stand on its own and speak for itself without needing to be part of the bigger picture.

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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2014 4:52 pm 
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Wow, this is...wow. This is really good!

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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2014 8:11 pm 
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Thanks, DisGo! (By the way, I'm going to keep calling you that until you tell me to stop...)


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Mon May 19, 2014 10:14 pm 
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Thanks, DisGo! (By the way, I'm going to keep calling you that until you tell me to stop...)

I kinda like that, actually.

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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 7:00 pm 
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So out of curiosity, are you planning on putting this up for a vote? And is there interest in a Singleton Anthology?


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 7:07 pm 
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So out of curiosity, are you planning on putting this up for a vote? And is there interest in a Singleton Anthology?

Well, people seem generally positive about it, so if people think it belongs in the archive, I'm fine with putting it up for vote, so yeah, I'll probably do that.

As for the anthology, it's an interesting idea, and I'd contribute, but we do have several other relatively big projects going on. So, it's up to the community which one(s) we pursue. I'm fine with any of our current options.


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 Post subject: Re: Pariah
PostPosted: Tue Jun 03, 2014 7:15 pm 
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Yeah we should probably bump the anthology threads to the front page again, and possibly start calling for submissions on social media.

I definitely think it belongs in the archive though. Not everything needs to be connected to the main expanded canon, after all.


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