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[Story] A short story I found in my notes http://862838.jrbdt8wd.asia/viewtopic.php?f=19&t=25528 |
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Author: | Lord LunaEquie is me [ Fri Oct 18, 2019 7:08 pm ] |
Post subject: | [Story] A short story I found in my notes |
So, I had been looking through old notes, and I came across this seemingly complete short story, some 1300 words long, that I don't have any memories writing. It seems to have been written around February 2018, and for the life of me I can't figure out what I was making it for. It was marked for the M:EM, but I don't recognize the setting or characters involved. If I ask anything of those reading it, it would be to tell me if they recognize anything here from another thread. Rereading it myself, I honestly found it a fascinating read, but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't partly because I was trying to figure out why I wrote this story and what I was planning with it. There wasn't even a title for the piece, so I don't have much to go on.
Spoiler
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Author: | Lord LunaEquie is me [ Fri Oct 18, 2019 7:36 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: [Story] A short story I found in my notes |
It seems Raven has helped me solved the mystery! Apparently, I wrote this as a piece set in a world I had been building at one time, but originally it had been for an RPG campaign. I'm not sure whatever became of that project, though I'm assuming if I marked this for the M:EM, I was hoping to convert it to be suitable to post here, but to introduce it via stories instead of a dossier. |
Author: | Aaarrrgh [ Mon Oct 21, 2019 4:50 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: [Story] A short story I found in my notes |
Well, no matter where it came from our why, it's a good read. I certainly want to know more about both this world and the people in the story. I really enjoy characters with non-human perspectives, and you did a good job of making the dragons feel properly alien in how they acted and related to each other. Well done! |
Author: | Lord LunaEquie is me [ Wed Oct 23, 2019 8:24 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: [Story] A short story I found in my notes |
Aaarrrgh wrote: Well, no matter where it came from our why, it's a good read. I certainly want to know more about both this world and the people in the story. I really enjoy characters with non-human perspectives, and you did a good job of making the dragons feel properly alien in how they acted and related to each other. Well done! I'm going to preface this by saying I have something of a second-person perspective on this story. I can't claim to be completely objective, because I can definitely see my style all over it, but since I don't remember actually writing it, I can't say what I was going for with any particular thing. That said, I don't agree that the dragons are "alien." I'd say they were a neat twist on the typical grandstanding and double-meanings of royalty, with a hint of that royal sociopathy that is common among such characters, but if they were that far removed from normal human behavior, I don't think they'd work as well. I would never hold this up to work like Shakespeare, but I think his is some of the most well-known work about royalty and royal problems, and I'd say there's a bit of a through-line one can follow as far as the motions and motivations these characters have: honor, pride, and greed especially. I mean, there's a whole section where they're basically just trying to one-up each other by naming what war theatres they've been to (not that all or any of the named locations/events were wars, but you get the idea). -------- Also, UPDATE! I found several pages of notes on the world this takes place in, buried some three folders down in my google drive. There was a lot of weird stuff I was doing with that world, almost all of it borrowed from one source or another and shaped slightly to get them to mesh with each other. Things like the five elven tribes from Elf Quest were meshed with Goblin Punch's "elves live on the moon" idea, which was combined with the mythology of Chang'e by having 13 moons which orbited a world tree, while the sun took a note from Egyptian mythology by following a river of mana which snaked through the Ashen Realm underneath the world (i.e. Hell). Minotaurs guarding the gates of hell, as seen here, was another idea borrowed from Chinese mythology, but there's plenty of ideas and terminology I had written down which is too blatant and probably wouldn't work for a Magic setting. Stuff like Vis, The Belonging Kind, Scub-Corals, Driders, etc. I do like that weirdness, though. I might come back to it, either to continue building it, or at least to convert what little I have into a usable setting for the M:EM. |
Author: | Aaarrrgh [ Thu Oct 24, 2019 12:44 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: [Story] A short story I found in my notes |
The alien perspective I was referring to was mostly about the lifespans and how much history was carried in the conversation. And sure, a lot of it can be seen as a parallel to human behavior, but that just means you managed to make it relatable even though that would not be a given. So overall I think you hit that balance well. |
Author: | RavenoftheBlack [ Thu Oct 24, 2019 5:35 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: [Story] A short story I found in my notes |
I think my favorite part of this is the sort of half-revealed history of the banishment of Ryxamahd. It's a cool little history that tells a lot about the world, and the relationship, if so you can call it, between Ryxamahd and Lady Caldwyn is equally telling. There's some exposition at the end that I'm not overly fond of, particularly the narrator calling almost casual attention to Bolga and her secret identity, but overall, as a glimpse of this world, this is good stuff. I'm glad I was able to help direct you to the original purpose of this piece's creation! |
Author: | Lord LunaEquie is me [ Thu Oct 24, 2019 9:30 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: [Story] A short story I found in my notes |
Aaarrrgh wrote: The alien perspective I was referring to was mostly about the lifespans and how much history was carried in the conversation. And sure, a lot of it can be seen as a parallel to human behavior, but that just means you managed to make it relatable even though that would not be a given. So overall I think you hit that balance well. Well, thank you, though I suppose I might quibble over the nomenclature; I like reserving the word "alien" for a much wider cultural gap, the kind of thing like... The best example I can think of that I've read recently is SCP 3003, which by concept is one of those if-the-universe-is-infinite-then-there-are-copies-of-Earth-out-there-in-space, but where the humans are hive-minded to the extreme. Classical stories of evil fairies from Celtic mythology come close -- where the culture of trickery is understandable from a human perspective -- but usually more whimsical and less truly bizarre. RavenoftheBlack wrote: I think my favorite part of this is the sort of half-revealed history of the banishment of Ryxamahd. It's a cool little history that tells a lot about the world, and the relationship, if so you can call it, between Ryxamahd and Lady Caldwyn is equally telling. There's some exposition at the end that I'm not overly fond of, particularly the narrator calling almost casual attention to Bolga and her secret identity, but overall, as a glimpse of this world, this is good stuff. I'm glad I was able to help direct you to the original purpose of this piece's creation! I don't think I had noticed it until you mentioned it, since it's obviously part of the falling action and wrap-up (as well as set-up for a plot that I suppose I must have imagined at one point), but that is rather obvious in how little it fits in with the rest of the story, isn't it? If I ever rewrite or expand upon this story, I might snip that paragraph out so that I can introduce Bolga properly, but I don't currently have plans on doing anything with this. Thanks for pointing that out, though, and of course thanks for your help jarring my memory. |
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