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PostPosted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 12:26 am 
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Hello, friends!

Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I'm pleased to offer a new short story. This one is titled "The Rule of Law," and it takes place on Raven's plane of Thorneau.

If it please the court, I'd like to offer my thanks to Raven, who generously offered his thoughts on initial drafts of this piece, and who steered me clear of committing multiple counts of continuity busting in the first degree. He is a gentleman and a scholar.

Let the record indicate that, as ever, any questions, comments, or criticisms which anyone may have are most welcome.

And, as ever, I very much hope that you will enjoy the story!

The Rule of Law

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"And remember, I'm pullin' for ya, 'cause we're all in this together." - Red Green


Last edited by OrcishLibrarian on Tue Jul 14, 2015 12:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Jul 13, 2015 12:44 pm 
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Yay! A Thorneau story that wasn't written by me! This is exciting!

I'm pretty sure Orcish has a pretty good idea of what I think of this story, but it bears repeating to everyone else and for the record. "I love it!"

I really like the character Orcish creates here, and it will be very interesting to see what comes from future Thorneau stories.

I did catch one typo (which I somehow managed to miss on my previous readings of this piece)

typo


Thanks so much for writing and posting this, Orcish!


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 12:15 am 
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Yay! A Thorneau story that wasn't written by me! This is exciting!

:D


I'm pretty sure Orcish has a pretty good idea of what I think of this story, but it bears repeating to everyone else and for the record. "I love it!"

Well, thank you again for the very kind words, Raven! I think this piece is a bit different from the sort of thing that I'm normally most comfortable with doing. So, to the extent that it turned out well, I'm very pleased.


I really like the character Orcish creates here, and it will be very interesting to see what comes from future Thorneau stories.

I mean, that's assuming that there are any such future stories, right? And who knows what the future might bring? The future is such an unknowable mystery!

Unless, I suppose, you're on Thorneau, where having the future told is easier than in most places...

:paranoid:


I did catch one typo (which I somehow managed to miss on my previous readings of this piece)

Thanks for the eagle eyes. I'll fix that bad boy.


* * *

Thanks again for reading, Raven, and for all the comments on the early drafts!

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 2:23 am 
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Ouch. Looks like it really sucks to be a male peasant in Thorneau.

When you described the Magistrate, I had her confused with the Duchess for a second. There's a planeswalker who would have a field day with the place.

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PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 12:44 pm 
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Ouch. Looks like it really sucks to be a male peasant in Thorneau.

To be fair, it probably sucks to be a female peasant there, as well. But yeah, male peasants are very much the bottom of the barrel on Foraine's hierarchy.

When you described the Magistrate, I had her confused with the Duchess for a second. There's a planeswalker who would have a field day with the place.

I almost get the feeling that the Duchess would take one look at Thorneau and say "Too easy." Almost.


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 14, 2015 11:09 pm 
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Thanks so much for reading and commenting, CKY! I hope that you "enjoyed" the story -- although I'll put those air quotes around "enjoy" in this case, since this is an admittedly grim sort of tale.


Ouch. Looks like it really sucks to be a male peasant in Thorneau.

Undoubtedly. Being at the bottom of the pyramid appears to be a pretty precarious spot in Foraine. Given that, it's not too hard for me to understand why some plucky revolutionaries might want to upend the aristocratic order in this particular locale.

Although, maybe the one nice thing I will say for Madame du Collet is that I don't get the sense that she discriminates on the basis of gender -- I get the sense that she is an enthusiastic murderer of both women and men... :paranoid:


When you described the Magistrate, I had her confused with the Duchess for a second. There's a planeswalker who would have a field day with the place.

Hrm... the resemblance was not intentional, so I apologize if it caused any confusion.

But, yeah, to your point and Raven's, I do get the sense that The Duchess would feel right at home in Foraine.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 19, 2015 11:19 am 
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Chilling stuff here. I like Madame du Collet quite a bit; she's a delightfully maniacal villain but also an interesting glimpse into the kind of violence that emerges when you have a system as exploitative as Thorneau's. She feels very much like she belongs on a Magic card--she's sort of exaggerated and she's got that magical noose gimmick, and it all comes together to make a really solid Legendary creature.

Well done :D


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PostPosted: Sun Jul 19, 2015 9:32 pm 
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Thanks so much for reading, Keeper, and for commenting! I'm really glad that you enjoyed this story!


Chilling stuff here. I like Madame du Collet quite a bit; she's a delightfully maniacal villain but also an interesting glimpse into the kind of violence that emerges when you have a system as exploitative as Thorneau's.

I'm glad to hear that the good Madame struck a chord. (Which, I swear to God, I didn't mean as a pun, until after I'd already typed it out.) Like you said, she's almost sort of cartoonish in her awfulness, but I think the scary thing about her is that her awfulness is an adaptive behavior for someone in her place in society. She literally can get away with murder, and she knows it, and she takes enthusiastic advantage of that fact.

Honestly, the real sort of terrifying moment for me was when I realized that I think she sincerely believes in this sort of pre-adolescent conception of justice. I don't think she's being facetious when she sentences Jean-Louis to die for her crimes. I think that, in her own warped sense of morality, she can expiate herself for her own sins -- and, Lord knows, I think that she sins *a lot* -- by punishing someone else for them. Crime necessitates punishment -- those are the two sides of a single coin. But the person who is punished doesn't have to be the same person who committed the crime. As long as someone gets punished, it evens out in the wash. It's sort of a whipping boy morality, taken to its logical extreme. And it just so happens that, through the fortune of her birth, Madame du Collet is the one holding the whip, which she has found that she enjoys very much.

Anyway, that's an undoubtedly convenient code of ethics for her to hold. But I don't think it's facetious. I think she genuinely believes what she says, about peasants and the law. And that, I think, is *terrifying.*


She feels very much like she belongs on a Magic card--she's sort of exaggerated and she's got that magical noose gimmick, and it all comes together to make a really solid Legendary creature.

That was very much the intent, here, so, if she had that effect, then I'm really happy about that. I was hoping she'd have that sort of Legendary Creature quality to her.

I'm not sure what her card would be, but I think I know the flavor text: I find you guilty of my crimes.


Well done :D

Thanks again for reading, Keeper, and for the kind words!

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