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PostPosted: Fri May 29, 2015 10:10 pm 
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Greetings, beautiful mutants!

Tonight, it's my great pleasure to share a new short story with you all. This one features that most mysterious man of magic, Nasperge, and it's titled "The Disappearing Act."

Before I myself disappear back inside the Aztec tomb, I'll just take a brief moment to offer thanks where thanks are due. First of all, I want to thank the good Barinellos, since it was a question that he raised which provided the crucial grain of sand for this little pearl to grow around. Second, I want to offer my gratitude to Raven, both for allowing me to use his wonderful character in this piece, and for providing some very helpful comments about the initial draft.

As ever, any comments, suggestions, or criticisms you may have are deeply appreciated. And, as ever, I very much hope that you will enjoy the story!

The Disappearing Act

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PostPosted: Fri May 29, 2015 11:32 pm 
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This piece warmed my heart. It's nice characterization for Nasperge - who we haven't seen much of at all, really - as well as a further look into Beryl's formative years. And of course, the pacing and dialogue are as finely crafted as ever.

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PostPosted: Sat May 30, 2015 3:20 pm 
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Before I myself disappear back inside the Aztec tomb,

Watch out for Dr. Krupp's Robot!

Orcish already knows this, but I really like this piece. I'll say one or two things in spoilers, but yeah, this is good!

Spoiler


Thanks for writing and posting, Orcish!


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PostPosted: Sat May 30, 2015 11:21 pm 
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Watch out for Dr. Krupp's Robot!

Don't worry -- I shall be neither seen, nor heard!


This piece warmed my heart. It's nice characterization for Nasperge - who we haven't seen much of at all, really - as well as a further look into Beryl's formative years. And of course, the pacing and dialogue are as finely crafted as ever.

Thanks so much for reading, CKY, and thank you for the very kind words! I'm really glad that you enjoyed the piece!

Nasperge is a very mysterious fellow. Even when I feel like I've managed to peer behind one of his illusions, there's yet another mystery hiding beneath it. But, hopefully, I do feel like we're seeing something about him in this piece which is genuine. It feels like he's honest with Moira in a way that he might not be in the company of anyone else -- even if the honesty between the two of them manifests itself as much in what they don't say to each other as what they do.

And, yeah, this is really our first outside glimpse of Beryl's childhood. We've seen little bits and pieces, but always as they exist inside Beryl's own memories and nightmares. Getting a look at her and her family through Nasperge's eyes is, hopefully, an interesting change in perspective.

Again, thanks so much for reading, and for the comments!


Thanks for writing and posting, Orcish!

Well, thank you for reading, Raven, and for your many fine insights and kind words!

That moment when Nasperge's spell is countered and his act falls apart is wonderfully captured, everything from Nasperge's reaction to the crowd's is just great, and spot on, and I think it's one of those uncomfortable moments we can all identify with.

Snotty teenage Astria makes a ton of sense to me.

That particular moment was really the germ for this particular story, and it came almost fully-realized out of a discussion I was having with Barinellos, so I want to thank him again for starting my wheels turning.

Once I had this idea about Astria trying to spoil Nasperge's trick, the next question that begged to be answered was: "What would Moira say to him about it, after the fact?" And then the whole piece basically took form. :)


Moira, much as Nasperge asserted back in Between Two Worlds, is a lovely person, not just a beautiful one.

Yeah. I like that Moira's not a saint in this piece, that she's not perfect. But there's this sort of grace to her, and it's real. That's the difference between beauty and loveliness, as Nasperge points out. Or between goodness and greatness, as Moira herself might have put it. You can see why Beryl loved Moira so much, and you can see why Nasperge was also so fond of her. She glows, as the Magician says.

Importantly, I think you can also see why Moira was so fond of Nasperge. It may seem like a sort of playful moment, when she kisses him on the cheek, and tells him that he's a good man. But, knowing what we know about Moira, I feel safe saying that's a term she does not use lightly. Again, "goodness" is a quality which Moira values above pretty much anything else. And she sees it in Nasperge.


8-year old Beryl is adorable.

When she declares that the baby bird needs a nest, I can just hear this earnestness in her voice, and it gets me a little worked-up.

For as much as Beryl's life has changed since the events depicted here -- for as much as Beryl herself has changed -- you can still see the flashes here of what makes her the person that she is, and what defines the person that she's supposed to be, as she puts it. She has a sense of wonder. She feels an urge to protect the people and things she cares about. And, most importantly, she knows what it means to love, and to be loved. No amount of scarring -- physical, or psychic -- has changed those things about her.

Whether you prefer to think of that as beauty, or goodness, or both, it's there. And it makes me happy to see it.

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PostPosted: Tue Jun 02, 2015 9:26 pm 
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The other interesting thing this piece does, albeit subtly, is amplify the horror of what happens in "The Fire." Nearly everything we see of the Houses is the scheming and the politicking and the aristocratic horribleness (well, that and the strained relationship between the two sisters, of course.) Here, though, we see a bunch of young people not so different from what we were at their age. These teenagers of House Trevanei were, at one time in their lives and perhaps later, more or less normal people. They didn't choose their place in the system any more than the Nameless did.

I mean, we don't know everything that happened as a result of "The Fire," but we can guess, and part of what this piece does, in the larger context of the Aliavelli arc, is help bring those events into stark reality.

Also, we learned that Aliavelli has lemonade and cakes. So that's cool!


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 03, 2015 9:59 pm 
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Also, we learned that Aliavelli has lemonade and cakes. So that's cool!

I know, right? And bacon, too. Vital information for anyone who's thinking of grabbing a bite to eat on Aliavelli. :)


The other interesting thing this piece does, albeit subtly, is amplify the horror of what happens in "The Fire." Nearly everything we see of the Houses is the scheming and the politicking and the aristocratic horribleness (well, that and the strained relationship between the two sisters, of course.) Here, though, we see a bunch of young people not so different from what we were at their age. These teenagers of House Trevanei were, at one time in their lives and perhaps later, more or less normal people. They didn't choose their place in the system any more than the Nameless did.

I mean, we don't know everything that happened as a result of "The Fire," but we can guess, and part of what this piece does, in the larger context of the Aliavelli arc, is help bring those events into stark reality.

That's a really interesting connection, Raven -- thanks for pointing it out. I wasn't consciously thinking of that when I was working on this story, so, if this piece serves that purpose, then that's a real, unexpected bonus.

Honestly, I think you've put your finger on what I consider to be one of the weaknesses of "The Fire," and of the Aliavelli stories in general. Namely, those stories have an unfortunate tendency to reduce secondary characters to nothing more than a group affiliation -- a Nameless, a Dentevi Sorceress, a Trevanei matriarch, etc. -- and, lost beneath the weight of those convenient, factional labels, the characters sort of lose their individual humanity.

Now, in part, that's a reflection of the social reality on Aliavelli. People there *are* labels, to an uncomfortable extent -- that's what Beryl dreamed of changing, after all.

But it also becomes easy to start thinking of everyone as a faceless representative of some larger entity, and to forget that those entities are composed of real people, all of whom have their own virtues and vices, their own hopes and dreams.

Partly, that's just a function of the fact that the stories were following Beryl pretty closely, and didn't often pull the camera back away from her for long enough for us to really develop much of a sense of empathy for the other inhabitants of this plane. (It also doesn't help that, with a few very notable exceptions -- Hepthia springs immediately to mind -- the other natives of Aliavelli whom Beryl ran across tended to be a pretty uniformly terrible lot.) "The Fire," in particular, keeps the lens in very tight on the main participants, so that, even when smoke starts to rise in the distance, and the streets begin to fill with the sounds of screaming, all that pain and suffering seems to take place at a very abstract level, particularly compared to Beryl and Astria and Alessa's pain, which is immediate and specific. So, when The Shifter smiles his horrible smile and tells Beryl that the Nameless are going to rise up, and that the Great Houses are going to fall, and that House Trevanei are going to be the first ones up against the wall, it's hard not to just think of the Great Houses as these parasitic, oppressive institutions, and to sort of feel like they had it coming. It's hard not to view the proceedings from this sort of 10,000-foot level.

Lost in all that, I think, is the brutality of what all that means. The Nameless and the Houses aren't abstract concepts. They're people. And they're about to kill each other. An awful lot of people are going to die. A lot of mothers are going to be left childless. A lot of children are going to be orphaned. People who do not know each other -- who've never met, who've never done a thing to harm each other -- are going to slit each other's throats, and burn each other alive. Leave aside what this might or might not mean for the social order on Aliavelli. Real people are going to die.

That is, of course, exactly what The Shifter wants. And that's why Beryl is so convinced that she has blood on her hands. Not just Astria's blood -- a whole city's worth.

Like you said, the glimpse we get in this story of House Trevanei shows a lot of stupid teenagers. But, you know what, I was stupid when I was a teenager. Those kids aren't faceless standard-bearers for some Great House. They're kids. Whatever else their virtues or faults might be, they're just kids at a birthday party.

And, now, they're probably all dead. There's a real chance that Beryl and Nasperge are the only two people we see in this story who are still alive right now.

Whatever they might have deserved, whatever their personal merits might have been, I doubt they deserves the fates they received. I doubt anyone deserves that sort of fate.

I made one effort before, to sort of pull away factional labels, and reveal the human faces beneath them. That one comes at the very end of "Friends and Killers," when an almost fully-unleashed Beryl suddenly finds herself staring into the face of the young Dentevi sorceress -- the one who hid during the fight, when Beryl killed her companions. And, in that moment, Beryl looks at this other woman, and she sees the fear in her eyes, she sees the pain on her face as her arm is burning beneath Beryl's grasp, and -- suddenly -- this woman stops being "A Dentevi Sorceress" -- an enemy -- and she just becomes another human being. Beryl looks at her, and she realizes: She could have been me. This could have been me, if my life had turned out just a little differently. Her fate could have been mine. And, for a moment, this sort of team-versus-team shortcut falls away, and we just have one flawed, imperfect human being deciding if she's going to look another flawed, imperfect human being in the eyes, and kill her.

And, of course, Beryl doesn't. Because Beryl doesn't view people as a means to an end. She views people as an end in-and-of themselves. She values people -- even the people who've hurt her the most -- and she's not going to take a life in cold blood.

But I think that scene is the exception, rather than the rule. On Aliavelli, I think that -- outside of the very personal conflict between Beryl and Astria -- the larger-scale violence has tended to be a little abstract, a little impersonal.

So, if this story helped to counter that a little bit, then I'm really, really glad.

Again, thanks for commenting, Raven!

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 04, 2015 7:51 pm 
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I know, right?

:paranoid:


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 04, 2015 10:27 pm 
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I know, right?

:paranoid:

Oh, man, now I'm super paranoid -- did I manage to put my foot in it, somehow? Or are we just marveling at my ridiculous tendency to yak about these pieces until my stream-of-consciousness commentary runs longer than the story itself?

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 04, 2015 10:30 pm 
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I know, right?

:paranoid:

Oh, man, now I'm super paranoid -- did I manage to put my foot in it, somehow? Or are we just marveling at my ridiculous tendency to yak about these pieces until my stream-of-consciousness commentary runs longer than the story itself?

Haha, the second one, I suppose. I was just surprised that my observation triggered such a detailed response. As a college professor, I'm used to my observations producing silence...

:D


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 04, 2015 10:56 pm 
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I was just surprised that my observation triggered such a detailed response.

Hey, it was an interesting point!

I'm sure I've said this elsewhere, but talking about stories is my absolute favorite part of this whole process. It's a heck of a lot more fun than actually writing the darn things! I'm usually a nervous wreck when I'm writing. (Mrs. OL can tell, just from looking at my fingernails, if I've been working on a story. Bitten-to-the-quick means that things are going poorly. Band-Aids on the fingertips means that things are going *really* poorly...)

But I love poking and prodding at the blasted things after the fact. And one of the most amazing things about getting to share the stories with this community is that you fine people notice things *in my own work* that I wasn't ever consciously aware of. That's why it's such a treat anytime someone reads and piece and leaves a comment -- I love finding out what the stories say to other people, because it's almost always at least a little different from what they say to me.

So, this was like a perfect case of that. You connected two dots which I don't think I had thought explicitly about connecting, and that got my gears whirring.

So, again, thanks for sharing the comment! :)

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 04, 2015 11:15 pm 
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I do enjoy having written stories more than writing stories, but I admit that I do get enjoyment out of the process, as well. Mercifully, I'm not a nail-biter. Mostly, what I do, is just occasionally sit back and just stop and think through the story so far, especially if I'm visualizing an action scene or something.

But I do agree that talking about the stories is a ton of fun!

So you're welcome!


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