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 Post subject: [STORY] The Phoenix King
PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2014 9:53 am 
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I'm bored, and this area seems sooo far dead, that I figured I'd try to get some more love down here.
November is my favorite month ever. Mostly it's because of holiday season (Halloween preceeds, my birthday and Christmas proceeds it), but NaNoWriMo helps hold the attention to November, for me at least.

I decided I'll sare my Nanowrimo stories bit by bit for whomever ventures down here to enjoy.

A bit of history behind this story...
Spoiler


This thread is for The Phoenix King (NaNoWriMo 2012), and I hope you guys enjoy it. I'll try to post links to whenever I post a new portion here (in case, you know, people decide to talk and/or discuss and/or ask questions in between). That brings me to, if you have anything to say, feel free to say it; questions, comments, critiques etc.

The Phoenix King aims to redefine what has become classic horror tropes in order to freshly utilize them and to keep you on your toes as to what can happen.

The front and back covers...
Spoiler


The Phoenix King Updates wrote:
(Note: I don't always post following the chapter designations)
POST I: HERE
POST II: HERE
POST III: HERE
POST IV: HERE
POST V: HERE
POST VI: HERE
POST VII: HERE (14.07.14)
POST VIII: HERE (19.07.14)
POST IX: HERE (23.07.14)
POST X: HERE (26.07.14)
POST XI: HERE (28.07.14)
POST XII: HERE (29.07.14)
POST XIII: HERE (01.08.14)
POST XIV: HERE (02.08.14)
POST XV: HERE (03.08.14)


EDIT: I guess it becomes obvious where I gathered my screen name from. :teach:

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quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

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Last edited by altimis on Sun Aug 03, 2014 8:33 am, edited 15 times in total.

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PostPosted: Fri Apr 25, 2014 10:10 am 
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Prologue -
Prologue:

Chapter 1 -
Chapter One - Part 1:
Chapter One - Part 2:
Chapter One - Part 3:
Chapter One - Part 4:
Chpater One - Part 5:
Chapter One - Part 6:

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quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


Last edited by altimis on Sat May 24, 2014 4:02 am, edited 5 times in total.

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PostPosted: Sat May 24, 2014 3:49 am 
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This entire time, I thought I gave you guys the entirety of Chapter One, so I was letting it sink in.
Apparently that is not the case... oops. Next part! This is essentially "Meet the Cast" I introduce characters, give them a few traits to start with, and (FUN FACT) the conversation in darkness was a personal challenge of mine to characterize the characters enough that you could tell them apart through the dialogue. I wrote out everything, and if I couldn't tell who said what, I changed it a bit.
Also, you'll recognize a lot of names of places (if you follow my YMTC business). The reason being, I recycle everything until something gets written down :p

Part Four:
Part Five:
Part Six:

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quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Sat May 24, 2014 9:38 am 
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I take pity on you all enough to give you the beginning of Chapter Two as well.

Chapter Two -
Part 1:

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squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 7:17 pm 
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I really should more diligent in this. Doing smaller bits more often rather than large bits less often. I'll work on that... no promises.
Continuing (and finishing) chapter two!

Part 2:

Part 3:

Part 4:

Part 5:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 12:06 am 
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Woo! I was paying attention this time! Here we are with the beginning of Chapter Three; we start learning about some backstory, and about the world development (how my versions of monsters differ from normal).

Part 1:
Part 2:
Part 3:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 09, 2014 1:40 am 
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Woohoo! for paying attention! We leanr a little more about how the world works and backstory. This entire chapter is that way.

Part 4:
Part 5:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 14, 2014 8:16 am 
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Part 6:
Part 7:


Finally done chapter three, lets move on to the intro of chapter four!
CHAPTER FOUR

Part 1:


As a final thought, especially now that we're done chapter three.
I would love some feedback on what you guys think of the world, and how the necormancy is portrayed?

Also I think it could be fun to see what you guys think is going to happen? I will tell you that the chapter intros become important later on (moreso in the next story though), and they also lead as a mystery for the readers to try and figure out who is talking, and what is going on. They will be explained and hopefully "make sense" to a point. This is a trilogy so some things will be explained throughout.

Thanks for reading, and I value any and all input!

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quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 19, 2014 2:06 am 
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Now we're going to start learning more about how the plot interacts with / affects the characters. These parts, not so much, but this chapter is basically saying: bad things happened, what are you going to do about it.
The over arching theme of this book is that question. What would you do?

Part 2:
Part 3:
Part 4:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 4:03 am 
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You're lucky; we're finishing chapter 4.
I was going to end it sooner, but where I decided the cutoff was (was a good stopping point), but I decided that I didn't like how it was left off, and just decided to finish it instead.

Part 5:
Part 6:
Part 7:
Part 8:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Wed Jul 23, 2014 4:08 am 
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Fun Fact: As I'm going over this here, I'm like "Oh my gosh, and I thought this was good." Not that I think it's bad, but when I wrote it, I thought it was better :p
As I go over the second story, I'm like, "This is definitely better." I'm really excited to start sharing that one (I made a language and grammar and all that jazz), but we have to finish this one first.

This story will start to pick up very shortly. Now, that we're at their stronghold, missions will crop up. And soon my favorite parts :D
Also, my favorite character will be making an appearance soon.

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2014 4:01 am 
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We're starting chapter five. We continue to see how this war is affecting the main characters as they prepare to capture one of the Phoenix King's dangerous leaders..
All of the main characters are roughly on the same page (Altimis having been far behind for the majority of the book thus far).

This is the beginning of the end, we're just over halfway through with this post. Also, someone dies this chapter...
Don't click here:


Part 1:
Part 2:
Part 3:
Part 4:

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quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:10 pm 
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This is a long chapter, and I was hiping to finish it this time, but there is a lot more than I was expecting and I don't want to cut off at an inopportune time, so here you go.
You guys might also notice that I use sleep to "pass time" a lot. Though it is true that I use that to bypass things I really don't want to write about, it is also timed specifically for a reason that becomes a driving factor for the remainder of the story. Just thought I'd let you know that I'm not 'as' cheap as I appear :p

Part 5:
Part 6:
Part 7:
Part 8:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 3:29 pm 
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I know this is pretty soon, but I go by a certain threshold of views before I make my next post, and well, this last section seemed to be more popular than the others. Well, now you guys get another bit of Chapter 5.
Again, I was hoping to finish chapter 5, but it is a lot longer than I apparently remember, I keep thinkinig it's almost done and then I get to it. Without further ado, let me get you to my favorite character at the very least...

NOT EDIT: I was actually double posting the last parts of the last post which actually brings us comfortably to the end of the chapter. To celebrate LET'S START CHAPTER SIX!

Part 9:
Part 10:
Part 11:


CHAPTER SIX:
Part 1:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 01, 2014 1:35 am 
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The library was my favorite room in this entire story, in fact it was a major reason I wanted to tell the story in the first place. I hope I do justice to the image in my head.
Part 2:
Part 3:
Part 4:
Part 5:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Sat Aug 02, 2014 2:05 am 
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You guys are matching my threshold faster. Either due to my increased posting, or increased activity here (I dunno), but here's continuing chapter six.

Part 6:
Part 7:
Part 8:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Sun Aug 03, 2014 8:32 am 
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The final chapter in the story. Its got lots of action, I can tell you that much.
This was one of my favorite chapters to write (I love planning and choreographing battles, just wait until the next story!), and needs no further introduction.

Chapter Seven
Part 1:
Part 2:
Part 3:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 12:56 am 
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This post is a bit longer than normal, but there's no real good spot to end during these next few scenes. But, that's secondary; the primary reason is...
We're almost done...
Next post will be the finale.

Part 4:
Part 5:
Part 6:
Part 7:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 7:44 pm 
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Okay guys, the threshold has been met, and not even a day has gone by yet.
I will post the grand finale of the story...

Part 8:
Part 9:
Epilogue:

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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PostPosted: Wed Aug 06, 2014 7:50 pm 
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All this said...
I would love feedback from you guys who have been reading this whole time.

I know nobody has talked at all during, but I would like to knowwhat you liked or disliked any questions etc.
It helps me know a bit more what people look for and certain things that I miss.

A question I have for you guys, and I have yet to find the answer online so maybe someone here knows...
The title of the character is: The Phoenix King. Do I need to capitalize the 'the' whenever referring to him? I have mixed feelings on it and have yet to get a definite answer.

Lastly, were you guys able to guess what was going to happen? Were you surprised? Who was yoru favorite character(s)? I want to know anything at all you have to share.

Thanks, so much! I hope you guys enjoyed reading this story as much as I had fun bringing it to life (with words... you know what I mean).

_________________
quotes wrote:
squinty_eyes: Alt, you have fantastic logic. And zero political prowess.
CKY: Through a convoluted series of events involving three tons of garden gnomes and a pickup truck, Henderson’s Magikarp defeats the Deoxys terrorizing the city.

My Cube | My Designs | My Art
Silver Soraka Main


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